(Prolifer)ations 5/5/08
by JivinJ
Once her husband got the news, he told her: “We shouldn’t be asking, ‘Why us?’ We should be saying, ‘Well, why not us?'”….
“I’m looking at him right now, and I see perfection,” Palin said. “Yeah, he has an extra chromosome. I keep thinking, in our world, what is normal and what is perfect?”
AK Governor Sarah Palin is a class act, a pro-lifer. I guess she’s cleaned up AK corruption too. She’s also been mentioned on some lists for R Vice President.
All children are a gift from God.
No prequalifiers are noted.
These people are a breath of fresh air.
Many oodles and oodles of kudos to ya.
There is no shortage of women choosing to gestate knowing their child will be mildly retarded. I question the numbers of women choosing to gestate knowing their child will need institutional care for whatever span of life it is capable of ‘living’.
We wouldn’t be reading about Sarah if she were a woman living in a ghetto with 14 children. Not even if all of them had Down. It wouldn’t be a pretty story. No happy happy ever afters.
I know this is off-topic, but I’ve been a little obsessed with pregnancy discrimination lately.
A friend of mine forwarded this post to me:
http://abovethelaw.com/2008/05/paul_hastings_farewell_email_a.php
It’s about an associate at Paul Hastings Janofsky & Walker law office in San Francisco. She got fired only 6 days after she suffered a miscarriage. It’s clear from the memo she wrote that she suspects that the firm took the opportunity to fire her before she got the chance to get pregnant again. I hope she sues the pants off them.
Oh, and by way of context, Paul Hastings is a pretty fancy place to work. Associates don’t get jobs there unless they walk in with a 4.0 GPA and a JD in their hand from a top 10 law school. I doubt the problem was with her performance.
Hiero:
Abortion is definitely of the same vane as pregnancy discrimination. Are you seeing the light yet?
Sounds like a bunch of sleazy attornies to me.
You’re right about them getting a taste of their own medicine. Tell her to contact the Allied Defense Fund. Also tell her to contact Hannity and O’Reilly.
Hey, where’s NOW and NARAL coming to the defense of this woman?
The LOVE of money is the root of all evil and evil causes abortion.
Hiero:
Abortion is definitely of the same vane as pregnancy discrimination. Are you seeing the light yet?
Sounds like a bunch of sleazy attornies to me.
You’re right about them getting a taste of their own medicine. Tell her to contact the Allied Defense Fund. Also tell her to contact Hannity and O’Reilly.
Hey, where’s NOW and NARAL coming to the defense of this woman?
The LOVE of money is the root of all evil and evil causes abortion.
Posted by: HisMan at May 5, 2008 7:31 PM
………………………………………………
Dude! Where is the ‘moral’ outrage from your religious leaders over the discrimination of women? Your moral compass is broken.
Talk about beautiful, inside and out!
Hier,
We definitely agree on this one.
I recall reading a similar incident of a woman who conceived as the result of rape. She had decided to go to term and keep her baby. She described the pressure she got from her employer, including threats of job termination, and co-workers to abort as well as threats by the insurance company to cut out her maternity benefits! Benefits that were part of her employment contract and she was certainly entitled to. All this because her child was conceived as the result of rape.
She said she could now well understand how a woman, without her means ( a good job, financial security and benefits, family support), especially a victim of rape, could easily succumb to the pressure to abort, whether she really wanted to or not.
How ironic the situation you describe would occur in San Francisco, where they consider themselves such bastions of tolerance.
She had decided to go to term and keep her baby. She described the pressure she got from her employer, including threats of job termination, and co-workers to abort as well as threats by the insurance company to cut out her maternity benefits! Benefits that were part of her employment contract and she was certainly entitled to. All this because her child was conceived as the result of rape.
That is unconscionable. I know that we’re in an economic downturn right now, but it still doesn’t excuse the bad behavior of employers who look for any reason to fire a woman who is or may become pregnant.
Hear, Hear, Hier.
@MK: Seconded. And that was punny. :)
Hier, 8:22PM
In fact this incident occured about 15 to 20 years ago and was more the result of prejudice against a rape victim than economics.
However, you are right that this is unconcionable, no matter what the “reason”.
MK, 8:32PM
I third that!! Hear, hear hier, and hear.
“There is no shortage of women choosing to gestate knowing their child will be mildly retarded.”
BS, ever notice why we never see down syndrome kids around anymore.
R.P.’s abortion story left me with one nagging question: Did she attempt to go to a crisis pregnancy center? She didn’t mention it, but if everyone was turning on her, why didn’t she turn to a CPC? Mary, Bethany, you’ve probably dealt with similar situations during your time at CPC’s. How would you have counseled her?
Dude, why don’t our religious leaders devote all of their sermons to talking about discrimination against women? Well, half of the sermons could be about that. The other half could be about why we should elect Barack Obama president.
Sally, seriously how many women have 14 children WITH Down Syndrome. You are a crackpot! Having a baby with Down Syndrome is not a happily ever after story but it’s a heck of alot better than living with the fact that you killed your child because it was less than perfect.
Most Down Syndrome babies are aborted today. Those wishing to carry their child to term rarely get the info they need. They have to seek out the support required.
Patricia, I’m sure Sally knows hundreds of poor women with 10+ Down Syndrome kids, and all of them are constantly begging to be killed. And it’s all because Christian pastors want to oppress women!! Why do they hate? :'((((((
Hi Carder,
Yes I have encountered some aspects of RP’s story working at a CPC. She sounds like a young woman who has spent her life in one abusive relationship or another, controlled by other people. Sadly I have seen this situation working in the ER as well. Women who for whatever reason are caught in a cycle of abusive relationships. Its so sad because all too often we just cannot reach them.
I have referred clients like this to professional counselling, we had counsellors who donated their services, mostly because I thought their problems were beyond any assistance I could give. Referral to a shelter for expectant mothers and mothers with children may also be feasible if one exists in your community, as it does in ours, or else a domestic violence shelter, being she was abused by a parent.
In a situation like this I found you can only offer your help and let the client know you are there to support and care. Its crucial the CPC volunteer recognize her limits and refer this woman for professional help. I’ve had a few clients develop a close bond with me in this situation and found it was important they know you are there for them.
I know of another CPC worker who had a client determined to have an abortion in order to “save” her relationship with the baby’s father. He walked out on her leaving her devastated and suicidal. The CPC worker had told the young woman the door was always open and to contact her for any reason should she need to.
The young woman reconnected with the CPC worker, who became so alarmed by the young woman’s deepening depression and talk of suicide that she referred her to professional help, and supported the young woman through it all. She likely saved that young woman’s life.
Sally, you said @ 7:08 PM:
“There is no shortage of women choosing to gestate knowing their child will be mildly retarded. I question the numbers of women choosing to gestate knowing their child will need institutional care for whatever span of life it is capable of ‘living’.
We wouldn’t be reading about Sarah if she were a woman living in a ghetto with 14 children. Not even if all of them had Down. It wouldn’t be a pretty story. No happy happy ever afters.”
My third child was diagnosed at 5 months with a left CCAM(compressed lung) and diaphramatic hernia, which shifted my son’s heart to the wrong side of the chest and hindered the growth of the normal lung. His prognosis wasn’t great. We were given the warning that at birth, if he made it to birth, it was very likely that he would die. He would need extensive care after birth if he survived.
At the time my husband, my other three children, and I were living in low-income housing (which is the ghetto of my city) and we could barely afford to put dinner on the table. Sometimes we couldn’t. We couldn’t afford the plane tickets to go back and forth to Sick Kid’s, the housing accomodations if the baby had to stay in the hospital in another city for a while, the care that he was supposed to need, or the medical supplies.
We chose to gestate and found that there were some very caring and giving people, some of who we didn’t even know that helped us plan, paid for our accomodations while out of town, cared for our other children when we couldn’t be there, and were prepared to stick it out with us after the baby was delivered. I know they would have stuck it out with us because they were mother’s who had been in our position before, some who were still caring for their special needs children, and were giving back what had been given.
We have a tendency to underestimate people. When we choose to take our child’s life because we’re hurting financially or feel alone we will never know how many people would have helped. More people than you would believe are kind-hearted and very giving. I was blown away.
Even so, I would have rather struggled and watched my child die in my arms than to be the cause of his death myself and do this to him:
http://www.thefetus.net/page.php?id=1930
I also know a woman at my church whose daughter has just been told her baby may have Trisomy 18. She has refused an amniostentesis because she has already determined she would not kill her baby.
This is what she may be looking at:
http://www.thefetus.net/page.php?id=1801
When someone kills their unborn child you can’t blame circumstances in their lives. The only reason someone kills their unborn child is because they don’t want to be bothered with dealing with those circumstances in order to preserve the life of their child. It’s about the person’s character. It’s about how that person responds to those circumstances, not the circumstances themselves.
Where there’s a will there’s way.
Dudette:
I express moral outrage on this blog against the wholesale slaughter of innocent woman in the womb evey day.
And I agree. Where’s the moral outrage expressed from the pulpt on this?
However, you’d be much happier and you would get a lot further if you didn’t think there was an evil man ready to diss you behind every tree. Sounds like your trapped by this hatred of men.
R.P.’s abortion story left me with one nagging question: Did she attempt to go to a crisis pregnancy center? She didn’t mention it, but if everyone was turning on her, why didn’t she turn to a CPC? Mary, Bethany, you’ve probably dealt with similar situations during your time at CPC’s. How would you have counseled her?
I agree absolutely with Mary’s post @ 9:47 regarding this question…she said it so well.
I wish that all women knew about all of the help, love, and support that was available to them in their times of despair. This poor woman needs to know she is loved.
Considering what I have learned about Pregnancy Help Centers, I don’t think I could have gone through with an abortion, way back when. If I would have met you Bethany or Mary things may have been different for my daughter and I.
Thank you both for helping women in their time of need.
(((hugs))) Carla.
She will be the one raising the child. It was her decision to make. She also obviously has all the resources she needs to cover any long term issues. Not every woman can say that. Antichoicers always have to attempt to belittle demean and denigrate women who end a pregnancy and their reasons for ending a pregnancy. Insisting that only ‘selfish’ and ‘uncaring’ women have abortions is one more antichoice lie.
The only ones who have ever belittled, demeaned or denigrated me on this board are PC. You have been one of the worst, TR.
Sally, you will never by blessed to know the love of a child with Down syndrome. Poor you. You have absolutely know idea what you are talking about. And your ignorant post proves it.
Patricia, I know you are on the pro-life side, but I must correct you on this comment: “Having a baby with Down Syndrome is not a happily ever after story but it’s a heck of alot better than living with the fact that you killed your child because it was less than perfect.”
It IS a happily ever after story. Even pro-lifers are brainwashed to think this is a tragedy. Yes, there can be challenges. There can be medical issues….usually treatable or correctable. But I will never find the words to tell you the joy of being the mother of a child with Down syndrome. No one can understand this unless they have had this experience. It is not what the world says it is. Mostly it is just mean and ignorant people that threaten the happiness of these people. (not you, BTW)
I would give anything to have 14 children with Down sydnrome. It would be heaven on earth.
“It IS a happily ever after story. Even pro-lifers are brainwashed to think this is a tragedy. Yes, there can be challenges. There can be medical issues….usually treatable or correctable. But I will never find the words to tell you the joy of being the mother of a child with Down syndrome. No one can understand this unless they have had this experience. It is not what the world says it is. Mostly it is just mean and ignorant people that threaten the happiness of these people. (not you, BTW)
I would give anything to have 14 children with Down sydnrome. It would be heaven on earth.”
Oh, Amen Ellie!
Ellie,
You are a woman after my own heart. Would love to adopt a little one with Down Syndrome. :)
I know of a couple that adopted a little boy knowing he would be born with Downs Syndrome. Its been a tough road for them – he also has fairly severe autism. But I am betting they wouldn’t trade him for all the “normal” children in the world.
Jasper: I know of plenty of children with DS and other disabilities. My aunt has a little girl with severe autism, and my uncle has a little boy with autism as well–mild, albeit. I went to school with a girl who has some form of learning disability, and there were lots of kids with DS.
I have a sort of fear of having a disabled child. Not because I am afraid or whatever of the disabled, but because I wonder about my own ability to care for someone who needs extra-extra care. I am a very impatient person. And, having gained lots of experience with young kids recently, I can safely bet that I will be a very impatient mother. I’m afraid I would be so worked up over all the care my child would need I would forget to love them. It’s a difficult sentiment to describe.
My boyfriend and I discussed this before: what would we do if we had a disabled child. I basically said I don’t know and then described to him what I just described to you. What he said–he worked with handicapped kids as a work experience thing last semester–is that he would do all he could to support a handicapped child. If it became too much to handle, even though he’s sure he would love the child, he would put him/her up for adoption. I said I couldn’t do that because I would feel like I’d failed as a mother, at which point he smiled and said “Aww… you’re all maternal!”
It’s good to have these things decided in advance.
Liz, of course there can be difficult cases; I know it is not “heaven on earth” for all familes of children with DS. But a non-DS child can also have Autism, as well. And then there can be challenges with ANY child even if they don’t have DS or Autism or any other labeled condition. The point I’m trying to make is that we need to stop assuming that having DS is a horrible thing or having a child with DS is a horrible thing.
I would say that most parents I have met who have children with DS feel blessed and understand that special joy.
> It’s good to have these things decided in advance.
Leah, the thing is that you don’t know in advance.
I did not want a child with DS; it was one of the things I worried about. I did not have testing done; didn’t want it. I am so glad I didn’t, because I would have feared it all through my pregnancy……for nothing. I am not the most patient person in the world, but I am very patient with my daughter. And the graces you get from their love really does help you.
We misunderstand the word “retarded.” I really don’t like that word at all. But it does not mean stupid. My daughter is one sharp little girl. True, there will be some concepts she’ll never get, but she understands a lot. She surprises me all the time.
Besides, what if you have your “normal” child you “planned” for. Then your child has an accident of some kind that leaves them with brain damage….something even more severe than having a child with DS. You just can’t plan for everything in life; it doesn’t work that way.
Ellie:
That’s very true. And as my boyfriend could tell you, that fact drives me crazy. If I don’t have a hand in something I become convinced it won’t get done. This goes back to when I was a little girl and I was a Detroit Red Wings fan and I was CERTAIN that if I were allowed to stay up and watch the whole game they would win.
I went to bed. They lost. :)
I realize that not everything can be planned and I can’t control everything (I envy God), but things that can be discussed and decided upon (all the “What would you/I/we do if…?” things) I will seize that.
Someday something will happen to me and I will know that that is God’s way of saying “You know what? You don’t get to decide everything. You don’t get to plan it all out.” I pray it isn’t something as awful as my child getting harmed. But it must be coming.
Leah, I don’t think anyone thinks they have the patience or even the ability to be a parent at first, let alone the parent of a child with special needs. There were several markers that seemed to point to my daughter having downs before she was born. We didn’t know how to raise a child with downs, but we knew that if that was the case, we would learn together, step by step. Now that turned out to not be the case, but the point is that no one is ready before the baby is born. No one feels that they have everything together and that they know all the theory behind being a parent and are ready to put it into practice. Having a child with special needs just adds one more layer of complexity to a job that one already has no idea about! I just got barfed on. Anyway, if it ever happens, Leah, I know that you will be able to handle it if you and your husband work together. God love you.
“Someday something will happen to me and I will know that that is God’s way of saying “You know what? You don’t get to decide everything. You don’t get to plan it all out.””
Oh what a wonderful attitude! Amen.
Carla: “Would love to adopt a little one with Down Syndrome. :)”
That is great, Carla. There are organizations that you can check out that facilitate adoptions of children w/special needs. I also saw one specifically for DS for international adoptions. I’ve hinted to my husband….
My husband thinks I have completely lost my marbles. He’s probably right. :) So I keep praying.
AP only covered the Palin story now? Geez… LifeNews.com had it over two weeks ago! http://www.lifenews.com/state3150.html
It is comforting to see a public figure like Arkansas governor Sarah Palin whose actions speak love.
Carla, if you can do it for him and not for yourself, then do it,