BPAS: Planning for sex like planning for rain
Our Just in Case kit means you have a back-up there when you need it, wherever you happen to be….
If you carry an umbrella in your bag or a spare tyre in your boot no one would suggest you are hoping for rain or planning on a puncture. Having the morning-after-pill to hand is no different. It doesn’t mean you’re planning on taking chances, it means you’re planning on protecting yourself when things don’t go according to plan.
~ British Pregnancy Advisory Service contraception nurse Tracey Forsyth, commenting on a program set to send free morning-after pills by mail to women who request them by phone during the 2012 Olympics in London, as quoted by The Independent, July 3
Jill Stanek is a nurse turned speaker, columnist and blogger, a national figure in the effort to protect both preborn and postborn innocent human life.
Right. Because the Olympics — bearing as they do the utopian weight of the IOC’s idealism — showcase humanity at its most deliberate and self-sufficient best.
Why is it that when humanity’s highest delusional aspirations are on deck, the streakers always show up on the field to lend some fresh dignity to the affair?
An umbrella assumes that rain could happen upon an unsuspecting person at any time.
Consensual sex doesn’t quite work that way.
Kel says:
July 5, 2012 at 2:20 am
An umbrella assumes that rain could happen upon an unsuspecting person at any time.
Consensual sex doesn’t quite work that way.
(Denise) No, but sometimes SEX itself DOES. Rape can happen and leads to pregnancy.
I don’t think the author is implying that sex just happens like rain happens. Sendoesnt imply that women should have EC in case they have sex unexpectedly. Rather they should have EC if their first method of contraception fails unexpectedly. Big distinction.
While you have control over Whether you have sex and whether you use cOnteaception. You don’t generally have control over whether or not the condom breaks
That’s an interesting comparison.
Is Nurse Forsythe’s intimate life more like rain, or more like a punctured tire?
In any case, intimate contact with a member of the opposite sex appears not to be something she anticipates with eagerness or enthusiasm.
Well, good to know all the London pedophiles will have quick and easy access to the MAP so they can continue to abuse their victims, no questions asked.
Except that it’s more like having a flat spare or a ragged umbrella:
http://www.lifesitenews.com/news/archive/ldn/2009/aug/09082709
(just another reason I don’t buy the “abortive properties” of the pill and MAP)
Forsyth: “It doesn’t mean you’re planning on taking chances”
Actually, that’s exactly what it means.
Shannon: “You don’t generally have control over whether or not the condom breaks ”
So Shannon, by the same token, should they be sending everyone free umbrellas and spare tires on demand as well? May as well throw in free treatment for easily-prevented STD’s, right?
Word of warning: that list of freebies gets VERY long VERY fast.
Very classy London. Very classy.
Making people think that there is an easy out even if a condom fails or is not used also creates a serious moral hazard problem, wherein they will be more likely to engage in ill-advised sexual encounters. This likely explains why studies have found that increasing access to emergency contraception does not decrease abortions.
Illogical thinking, and it makes women seem incapable of self-control. Rain is a force of nature beyond anyone’s control or choice. Flat tires are likely not the result of a person’s deliberate choice. SEX IS within our control and decision capabilities. If things don’t go according to plan, it’s because you decided not to follow the plan!
Do women have the ability to control themselves or not? Do we have brains or not?
Are we helpless? Sure sounds like it according to Nurse Forsyth.
This likely explains why studies have found that increasing access to emergency contraception does not decrease abortions.
Or unintended pregnancy.
http://www.aaplog.org/position-and-papers/emergency-contraception/news-release-statement-on-jama-emergency-contraception-study/
Because dumping fake hormones into women’s bodies on a steady basis isn’t enough, let’s advise backing up risky behavior with a mega dose of fake hormones.
Or
Because our products don’t work well enough (or you consumers fail on your end) you need to buy MORE of our products to make up for the deficiencis.
What a crock! Mixing the ‘gimme sex with no consequences’ crowd with the pharmaceutical industry has made for crap medicine and ridiculous sales tactics.
10 years from now, will we be discussing backup options for backup birth control? It’s laughable and pathetic.
X, I’d really like to believe your position. Tried your link and it sent me to a general page?
bah. I found something in New Scientist, but can’t get to the whole article:
http://www.newscientist.com/article/mg19125702.700-doubts-over-efficacy-of-morning-after-pill.html
Jen says:
July 5, 2012 at 12:51 pm
Illogical thinking, and it makes women seem incapable of self-control. Rain is a force of nature beyond anyone’s control or choice.
(Denise) Girls and women get raped.
Shannon, having access to emergency contraception gives women a false security and makes them more willing to have sex with people they wouldn’t raise children with (makes them less picky about partners).
I believe that the best way to have sex is to save it for your spouse. If you can’t do that, at least make sure it’s with someone who you wouldn’t mind having a kid with because, you know, sex makes babies. This is just inviting disaster.
Having that “backup” will inevitably lead to more women making irrational sexual behaviors. Not to mention it’s so unsafe for your health…. This is such a big mess.
What in the world does emergency contraception have to do with the Olympics?????
Except for rape, the basic problem is that girls and women are still to a large extent emotionally dependent on boys and men. Polly Bergin recalled many lectures when she was growing up but said, “Nobody ever talked about FEELINGS, about wanting to feel wanted and held close and safe.” This yearning for emotional intimacy and hugging is often used by men to receive sexual favors. How do we decrease this yearning for emotional intimacy?
Can it be re-directed to other females?
To pets? Don’t make a joke. I’m not talking about bestiality but about hugging and emotional closeness.
Can the yearning for emotional intimacy be replaced by a more intellectual orientation?
How can we lead more girls and women to be satisfied by the company of a book or movie rather than that of boys and men?
The young woman who is without a boyfriend is often pitied. How do we make it popular to be unpopular?
The most important part of what Liberty said bears repeating:
“…makes them more willing to have sex with people they wouldn’t raise children with (makes them less picky about partners).”
I think there are a large number of women who have aborted children because they no longer liked their father (to say nothing of love). Maybe children don’t deserve to die because their parents are foolish. Just a thought.
Courtnay,
Because THE ATHLETES WILL BE ARRIVING!!
And also all of the sex trafficked girls to satisfy those lacking in self control.
Thanks, Ninek!
When children are killed because of their parents’ fickleness, it breaks my heart. How many children have been sacrificed because the mother wants to “get back at” the father? Or how many women have had abortions because they didn’t “love” or “like” the father? Then why have sex with them?
Why on earth would you share the most intimate form of human contact with somebody that you wouldn’t be willing to raise a child with? (to say nothing of marriage).
What a sad, sad world we live in.
You know they make a good point, i should be fully prepared for the next time i’m walking down the street towards a woman and we both slip on a banana peel and land square on each others uncovered junk.
Carla says:
July 5, 2012 at 2:52 pm
Courtnay,
Because THE ATHLETES WILL BE ARRIVING!!
And also all of the sex trafficked girls to satisfy those lacking in self control.
(Denise) Do they even bother with contraception for the sex trafficked? Isn’t it more likely they abort or place babies for adoption?
I read an article about a sex trafficked young woman. She got pregnant and was aborted. When she asked her pimp/enslaver for time off to heal after the operation, he gouged out one of her eyes.
U-104 says:
July 5, 2012 at 3:33 pm
You know they make a good point, i should be fully prepared for the next time i’m walking down the street towards a woman and we both slip on a banana peel and land square on each others uncovered junk.
(Denise) OK, OK. Hahahaha. There is a legitimate point there. Sometimes a condom slips off or ruptures. Sometimes a woman forgets to take her Pill.
Much sexual activity is impulsive. Girls and women who don’t plan in advance to engage in the act succumb to their natural feelings. Finally, there is always the possibility of RAPE. These are all realities and connected to pregnancy.
wow. If you think that using contraception automatically means you’re fooling around with someone you wouldn’t want to have a child with…just…wow. I can’t even…wow.
xalisae, this might help. (the press release)
Emergency contraception fails to halt abortions
http://www.eurekalert.org/pub_releases/2006-09/bmj-ecf091406.php
u-104, that’s happened to me several times.
Wait, no. No, it never has.
Courtnay says:
July 5, 2012 at 5:08 pm
u-104, that’s happened to me several times.
Wait, no. No, it never has.
(Denise) As I pointed out, condoms slip, break, and leak. Girls and women may forget to take a Pill. Much sexual activity is impulsive.
There is always the possibility of rape.
Don’t you agree that it is better safe than sorry?
That an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure?
Libertybelle,
“Shannon, having access to emergency contraception gives women a false security and makes them more willing to have sex with people they wouldn’t raise children with (makes them less picky about partners)
I wasn’t advocating EC. Though I am glad it is available. Only stating that the author was not saying that having unexpected sex was akin to unexpected rain, implying anything else is fictitious.
I haven’t done the research but I would imagine EC would make people more likely to have unprotected sex (without a condom) than it would make them less picky about sex partners. I.e. I don’t see why ec would make you less discerning than the pill or a condom. But yes one of the adages of bc is that it makes people less picky about partners that is certainly one of the points.
X, I don’t think they mean using contraception means that; more-so the emergency contraception.
X wrote:
If you think that using contraception automatically means you’re fooling around with someone you wouldn’t want to have a child with
I don’t think most of us assume that automatically, but in my own life experience, among myself and my friends, we were EXTREMELY cautious during high school when birth control wasn’t common among us, but by the end of college, we’d become very cavalier about who and when. It doesn’t mean that we didn’t care about our partners at all, but we made some foolish decisions because we thought there wouldn’t be any consequences. It might be summed up in the difference between looking for Mr. Right and settling for Mr. Right Now.
@Denise Noe
“Girls and women who don’t plan in advance to engage in the act succumb to their natural feelings.”
If only women had more common sense than dogs, only in my fantasy i guess….
“Finally, there is always the possibility of RAPE.”
Well rape is just a man succumbing to his natural feelings.
“Don’t you agree that it is better safe than sorry?”
“Girls and women who don’t plan in advance to engage in the act succumb to their natural feelings.”
?
well, in my own life experience, I didn’t screw anyone I wasn’t ready to have a child with, because I’ve always understood that a child is what comes from screwing, and contraception can fail.
Hey X! That’s not what I meant at all! I’m using contraception with my husband and obviously I want kids with him ( I married the guy and all… so you know, I’m a sort of a fan of his).
There are tons of people who use contraception for a myriad of reasons. Contraception use has no bearing whatsoever on the health of the relationship or the willingness to have kids with the person. And I’m truly happy that you were responsible and didn’t screw people you don’t want kids with!
BUT my point was that there are in fact a lot of people who don’t operate under that premise. I worked in a pregnancy center for a while and there were so many girls who came in and didn’t want their kid because they couldn’t stand the father. Disconnect. And I think the mentality was: Well, he’s hot, I’m hot, and there’s BC. If not, abortion is always there…
I’m not saying it makes sense, but there are people out there who operate that way. And pushing EC on a culture gives people a false sense of security. I think it allows *more* people to ignore the fact that kids could come from sex, by virtue of having EC readily accessible.
It’s becoming more common to see people hooking up with people they wouldn’t want to date, let along have kids with. One of my dear friends had an intimate relationship with a girl he didn’t even want to bring home to his parents. So that’s all I was saying.
Having EC pushed on people as “readily accessible backup” akin to spare tires and umbrellas creates a mindset that sex is no big deal, you’re covered if you mess up. There won’t be consequences. If there are, here’s a quick fix to get rid of the mistake. It’s a cultural mentality thing, not an individual relationship thing.
They’re talking about an “Emergency Kit” anyway… not the consistent use of contraception as a whole. So there’s that difference too.
Then I’m absolutely sorry to have jumped on ya like that, LB! I just think the mindset around here can get kinda skewed sometimes in regards to contraception, and I don’t personally think there’s anything wrong with physical intimacy with your mate even if the idea of having a child right then and there might be a bit of a sticky wicket. If my tubal were to fail right now and I were to become pregnant, hubby and I would be TERRIFIED of the fiscal and logistical implications of that. But, WE. WOULD. BE. ECSTATIC!!!!
I never understood the whole, “I’m hot, you’re hot, let’s do it!”, mostly because I never saw myself as “hot” ( ;P ) but also because I just cannot imagine having such an immature mindset with regard to such a mature activity. Then again, it was easy to see sex in the context of babies growing up since I was surrounded by them all the time as the oldest of 6 kids in my family. Granted, I’ve also always been interested in politics, my worst fear in first grade was nuclear war/home invasion and burglary, and had a great deal of disdain for most of my peers my whole life because I was constantly disgusted by their immaturity.
I agree with Xalisae about contraception, as usual.
” I never understood the whole, “I’m hot, you’re hot, let’s do it!”, mostly because I never saw myself as “hot” ( ;P ) but also because I just cannot imagine having such an immature mindset with regard to such a mature activity.”
I would take issue with this though, just a bit though. A lot of people seriously were not taught that sex was a mature activity. Some weren’t taught about sex at all, and just kinda figured it out on their own. That doesn’t make them immature. Ignorant, maybe. If all you ever learned about sex was “be safe” or nothing at all, it isn’t hard to see why it isn’t a big deal to a lot of people. At least until they have to deal with the consequences.
Hey X, no worries!
We probably would have been really good friends as kids, because I was always on the lookout for house fires/burglary/war/serial killers… Yeah I was little morbid, I guess. I always slept by the door of the bedroom I slept in with my sisters so that if a killer did come in, he might be satisfied with me and leave my sister’s alone. Needless to say, my parents tried to keep me away from the news. 
(and I also never considered myself hot, not understood the need to bump body parts cause you’re bored. Sex was something I desired, but I wanted myself a husband!! I credit my parents and their lovely relationship heavily for that one…)
I totally get where you’re coming from. Right now would be a very bad time to have kids for us, too. But we’d be thrilled as well. Just because you’re trying to have kids at a particular point doesn’t mean you would automatically abort and/or that you have a dysfunctional relationship with your significant other. It does come across that way here many times!
If all you ever learned about sex was “be safe” or nothing at all, it isn’t hard to see why it isn’t a big deal to a lot of people. At least until they have to deal with the consequences.
Well, I’ve always been very interested in science, so the first thing I learned about sex was, “It makes new organisms.”
“the first thing I learned about sex was, “It makes new organisms.””
(if you will permit me a moment of semi-infantile humour)
Indeed, many people know that you shouldn’t drink and drive, since people cause accidents.
What many don’t realize is that the opposite is also of concern: don’t drink and park, since accidents cause people.
A little appreciation for risk and consequences goes a long way.