The pro-life movement has a saying, "Why can't we love them both?" It's very freeing.
Pro-aborts can't say that. They have to draw emotional and linguistic lines, depending on whether a baby is wanted or not. Even then, I can't imagine they have easy times attending baby showers or feeling a baby kick through a friend's abdomen. Here's a happy-sad example, from pro-abort Parminder Bell's blog yesterday....
it is okaythat my friend is pregnant, even though we are only 20 right now.
I will make her so many amazing baby things. Blankets and maybe a hat or something.
I can go out and buy cute baby outfits for her child. I'll be like an aunt. In fact, I will be, if our past promises hold up.
I know I won't be able to help but love this baby - if she keeps it, instead of adopting it out. Which maybe would be a good idea too, but I'll be supportive and if it stays, it stays with my blessing.
I am making a CD of sweet music for the baby to relax to. It's very indie. This is how we cope.
I will take care of them - Nan and her child - any way I can. Even if it's just random gifts, they will know that I care and that I'd do anything for them.
Already I feel something like tenderness for this little embryo that's going to be a person soon. Amazing, how I can jump from thinking an abortion is a good idea to actually caring for the child in question. I think that's all part of third-wave feminism, though - you can be pro-choice AND love babies/motherhood, and you don't feel bad about it. If she wanted an abortion, I would be okay with that - but if she wants a baby, then by God, she will have a baby and I will love it like family....
Anyway. It is okay. It will be okay.
Actually, dear Parminder, the first wave of feminists were pro-life. You're coming full circle.
Comments:
Was that Gloria Steinem commenting or was it Elanore Smeal?
Posted by: momof3 at April 3, 2007 4:52 PMto say pro-choicers have to draw emotional lines is ridiculous. They can certainly care for both the child and the mother, and pro choicers will support the mother no matter what her choice, whether it be to have an abortion or to have the child. Also, there are many pro-choicers who say they would not have an abortion themselves but believe in a woman's right to choose. pro choice =/= pro abortion, as that certainly shows.
Posted by: Dan at April 3, 2007 5:28 PMMom, what do you mean?
Dan, you're calling Parminder Bell ridiculous, then, because she as a pro-abort is working out her ambiguous feelings online, which I simply cut and pasted.
Posted by: Jill Stanek at April 3, 2007 5:40 PMSorry Jill,I must have misunderstood.Let me go and re read.
Posted by: momof3 at April 3, 2007 6:05 PMOK I think I've got it now.Sorry.Glad to see she is thinking about the baby.Perhaps a change of heart.
Posted by: momof3 at April 3, 2007 6:29 PM"Even then, I can't imagine they have easy times attending baby showers or feeling a baby kick through a friend's abdomen."
This is so not true. Why would we have trouble doing that? As Dan said, we support women regardless of their decisions. It's about the opportunity to choose, not about what the decision is.
That being said - the baby in the pic looks a lot like my nephew who's about 4 weeks old. Cute.
Posted by: Ingrid at April 4, 2007 4:44 AMThis is so not true. Why would we have trouble doing that?
I don't know...maybe you could ask Parminder?
Posted by: Bethany
at April 4, 2007 8:22 AMBethany, sarcasm doesn't suit you. Leave that to others.
And I'm getting frustrated here. Once again, Ms. Stanek picked one person as an "example" of what pro-choicers think. We love babies. We just don't want women to be forced to have them.
Posted by: Ingrid at April 4, 2007 10:54 AMSarcasm? Where?
I asked a serious question.
at April 4, 2007 11:06 AMWe love babies. We just don't want women to be forced to have them.
Ingrid, when you say "I love babies" , then you say that the natural process of pregnancy (when it's invonvenient) is equal to a woman being "forced to carry a baby"....well, your quest to prove yourself as a baby lover just really isn't believable.
at April 4, 2007 11:12 AMBethany, how is a pregnancy where the mother has no chance but to carry it to term, even if this situation is unwanted, not forced?
Posted by: HumanAbstract at April 4, 2007 2:14 PMI took your thoughts, which i believe was something along the lines of pro choicers having to draw a line, which is simply not the case. The author even states in the piece you bolded that one can be pro choice and still love/care for a child and the child's mother. No line has to be drawn, we support the woman no matter what her choice will be, and if a child is born good for the mother, we will be there supporting her and the child and will certainly love them. If the woman were to choose abortion we would be there to support her. Either way pro choicers can certainly show care and support
Posted by: Dan at April 4, 2007 3:26 PM"...well, your quest to prove yourself as a baby lover just really isn't believable."
Really? Wow. Sorry to hear that.
Actually... nah. I don't care if you don't find it "believable" that I'm pro-choice and yet love babies. For me, one doesn't exclude the other.
Dan, you're wasting your breath. I think they don't want to understand the meaning of the word "choice".
Posted by: Ingrid at April 4, 2007 3:54 PMI took your thoughts, which i believe was something along the lines of pro choicers having to draw a line, which is simply not the case. The author even states in the piece you bolded that one can be pro choice and still love/care for a child and the child's mother. No line has to be drawn, we support the woman no matter what her choice will be, and if a child is born good for the mother, we will be there supporting her and the child and will certainly love them. If the woman were to choose abortion we would be there to support her. Either way pro choicers can certainly show care and support
Dan, I don't think this blog piece was as much a statement as it was a defense against what pro-choice advocates consistently use against us. They always say we don't care about the mother somehow because we want to protect babies from dying. Nothing could be further from the truth.
This blog post is partially written to prove that we can love them both.
In fact, the part in bold proves that a pro-choice woman can also love them both as well. I think the writer was having a realization, regardless of whether she admitted the baby was a child at this time, she already had warm feelings for the unborn baby.
I think that is what is so amazing about this article. She talks about how she has always supported abortion, but she has warm fuzzy feelings for an embryo, something she has always considered to be "not so important". I think this confuses her, but she appears to be trying to figure out a way to explain it from her perspective.
at April 4, 2007 4:43 PM