Do it for the kids?

A reporter from Focus on the Family's Family News in Focus called yesterday about a story she's preparing on the Abercrombie & Fitch t-shirts I reported on here and here December 14.

She said someone wondered in a production meeting yesterday morning how does Stanek find all her stuff? Her first question to me was exactly that, and I responded, "Tips, I get great tips. I hardly have time to do my own scouting anymore because I get so many good tips." The A&F tip came from John Jansen of Pro-Life Action League.

So this morning moderator Jacqueline sent me a great tip based on the A&F-tipped post! Jacque gave me the link to this t-shirt on BustedTees.com:

do%20it%201--4.jpg

At first glance, this t-shirt could be one promoting procreation. In fact, it does. But it doesn't mean to. Here is the vile description of the shirt:

do%20it%202-5.jpg

I still don't get how the words on the t-shirt translate into that obviously low caliber, young male-written message. (Young males most support abortion, btw. No wonder.) Perhaps someone can explain.

I prefer my own translation, which makes the shirt clever and humorous.


Comments:

I can explain. Often politicians and activists talk about doing this or that "for the children". That's what this shirt is alluding to. It's intended as a disrespectful, sarcastic slogan, which ignorant teens who think they know everything just adore.

Posted by: John Lewandowski at December 18, 2007 9:54 AM


Nice, John!

Posted by: Bobby Bambino at December 18, 2007 9:57 AM


Oh, Jill....do tell!!!

Posted by: AB Laura at December 18, 2007 9:59 AM


Don't we also have A&F to thank for marketing the delightful
trend of sagging to the knees pants, with boxers
showing above in all their glory?

Posted by: lesforlife at December 18, 2007 10:31 AM


Yes, DO tell !

OT here, but I have to share this:
Over the weekend, I made the fatal mistake of going into one of the many coffee houses here. (I was early for an appt. so I was killing time...) There was some bimbo teenager sitting at the table next to me talking to one of her bimbo friends on her cell phone in that insipid "bimbo-ese" they speak. Here are her exact words: "OH MY GAAAAAAWWWWD...I can't BELIEVE it....I have to like take my friend Julie to the abortion clinic UH_GEN....it's like, I can't believe we have to like go there UH-GEN.....I'm like, doesn't she like believe in like BIRTH CONTROL...she doesn't even know WHOSE kid it IS...she's just like SO stupid..."

I just glared at her and got up and left. As I was leaving, she said to whoever she was talking to, "Oh my Gaaaaawwwwd...this man just like gave me the dirtiest look...he's probably one of those people that like thinks abortion is like bad...I hate people like thaaaaaaat".

She's like, SO right.

Posted by: Mike at December 18, 2007 10:36 AM


Mike, great (sad) story with a great last line.

Posted by: Jill Stanek at December 18, 2007 10:55 AM


Mike, I mean, like don't be so judgemental! Like who cares if like that girl like sleeps with like every guy in town? I mean like she's not hurting you! Ya know?

She's actually like HELPING the people at PP like keep their job! Ya know?

Posted by: Kristen at December 18, 2007 10:59 AM


Thank you once again Jill for alerting us to these things. Along with the stuff our kids are exposed to on TV, the movies, and 24/7 via the internet it is no wonder why we see the types of aberrant behavior that seems so commonplace.

The mindset at Abercrombie and Fitch is a mirror reflection of the Planned Parenthood mentality. They both promote a culture of self-indulgence and they both contribute to and thrive on the continuous assault on mainstream values and beliefs.

Posted by: Jerry Nickels at December 18, 2007 11:24 AM


A&F doesn't do the saggy pants, they brought back the ripped to shreds jeans. The saggy pants were jnco, which was all the rage when I was in 7th grade.

BTW, people wear these kinds of shirts to be funny and clever..

like this:
http://www.tshirthell.com/store/product.php?productid=1012

and this:
http://www.tshirthell.com/store/product.php?productid=330

Posted by: JKeller at December 18, 2007 11:27 AM


Mike,

I 2nd Kristen. LOL!...

PP loves these type of people who ill-informed about abortion.....

Posted by: jasper at December 18, 2007 12:13 PM


It's just a t-shirt

Posted by: Q at December 18, 2007 12:20 PM


"It's just a t-shirt"

That would fly if it had no message on it. Words change things, or hadn't you noticed? They reflect ideas and actions, which always have consequences...in this case, tragic, avoidable ones.

Posted by: Pat at December 18, 2007 12:31 PM


Seriously, it IS just a t-shirt...even with those evil words on them.

And it's from BustedTees....a site that has tons of ridiculous shirts that are meant to be funny...not carry ANY sort of moral connotations or anything of the sort. It's a site known to be funny and ridiculous and pokes fun at people...all people.

I think its both funny and sad that there's so much fuss about a shirt that no one actually takes seriously.

It's a T-SHIRT people.

Posted by: Jodes at December 18, 2007 12:48 PM


This shirt is actually pretty funny to me..only for the exact opposite reason it is intended to be. hahaaa...

Posted by: Elizabeth at December 18, 2007 12:52 PM


If you show young people Christian T-shirts will they start nailing people to lumber? Kill firstborns? drown people?

These T-shirts ARE all-powerful. The "Just Do It" one could be the end of us all.

Posted by: Laura at December 18, 2007 12:59 PM


I think Jodes, that what a person wears tells alot about him/her. It's not so benign as one would think. My son (17) who lives with his dad went to a job interview with a t-shirt that had something about a$$holes and flying on it (can't remember the line exactly. He was astonished when he didn't get the job and a less qualified friend did. His sister, (15) correctly pointed out to him that if he's gonna wear shirts that have stupid sayings on them, then people are gonna think he's a jerk and LIKE, just might not hire him. Needless to say, it was alearning experience for him, (one that his sister, apparently didn't need to go through) and the shirt is now gone.

Posted by: Patricia at December 18, 2007 1:02 PM


Don't we also have A&F to thank for marketing the delightful
trend of sagging to the knees pants, with boxers
showing above in all their glory?

Posted by: lesforlife at December 18, 2007 10:31 AM
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Why yes!
Abercrombie and Fitch is responsible for all cutting-edge gangsta culture. (At least they were until Fitch was gunned down in an ugly drive-by incident.)

Posted by: Laura at December 18, 2007 1:04 PM


I just glared at her and got up and left. As I was leaving, she said to whoever she was talking to, "Oh my Gaaaaawwwwd...this man just like gave me the dirtiest look...he's probably one of those people that like thinks abortion is like bad...I hate people like thaaaaaaat".

She's like, SO right.

Posted by: Mike at December 18, 2007 10:36 AM
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Mike has a rich and full fantasy life.

Posted by: Laura at December 18, 2007 1:08 PM


Patricia, I agree. Not only do they tell a lot about the person who wears them but about the parents (especially if it's a teen.)

My husband is a teacher and some of the t-shirts the kids wear to school are stupid/gross/offensive and I wouldn't let my kids walk out of the house like that.

We've told our kids, in no uncertain terms, that if they buy clothing like that it'll be a waste of money because it'll go through my shredder the second it's out of the bag.

I can't stand when parents say "I can't control what he/she wears." Well I say you can pretty much control everything else like car, money, food, room, etc. They don't want to wear appropriate clothing then I don't want to feed them. Hey, we all have a choice.

Posted by: Kristen at December 18, 2007 1:12 PM


Patricia, are you telling me that every teenager or person you see on the street, you base your opinion of them based on how they dress?? Are you saying that a person can't wear certain things because the world will think a certain thing about them?

I don't want to sound mean, but to say that wearing a t-shirt is going to influence your opinion THAT much, then there may be something wrong.

At the same time, I do understand what you are saying about the job interview thing...but that's a specific situation, where he may not have been seen "as a jerk" but merely not taking the situation seriously and being respectful of the situation (i.e. the interviewer IS judging you).
But that is a very specific and special situation.

For an everyday thing, I have to say that too much emphasis is put into how people look if this harmless and innocent and FUNNY t-shirt is seen as a judgment tool.

Seriously. It's a t-shirt. And that's it.

Posted by: Jodes at December 18, 2007 1:15 PM


Kristen, I am not up-to-date on American law, but if you deny food to a minor, for the simple basis of the clothes they wear, can't they go to the police and charge you with child endangerment?

(p.s. that's half sarcastic, and half a real question)

Posted by: Jodes at December 18, 2007 1:18 PM


"His sister, (15) correctly pointed out to him that if he's gonna wear shirts that have stupid sayings on them, then people are gonna think he's a jerk and LIKE, just might not hire him."

Well, his problem was that he was stupid and wore the T-shirt to a job interview, not that he wore the T-shirt in general. There is an appropriate time and a place for these things (a more casual settiing, like at home, with friends, at school).

Posted by: Stephanie at December 18, 2007 1:19 PM


John,

I can explain. Often politicians and activists talk about doing this or that "for the children". That's what this shirt is alluding to. It's intended as a disrespectful, sarcastic slogan, which ignorant teens who think they know everything just adore.

Posted by: John Lewandowski at December 18, 2007 9:54 AM

I know you were referring to ignorant teens and not all teens. Most teens and I mean around 90% or more are wonderful hardworking and respectful. The problem is the mountain of disrespect that is thrown at them which of course they return when they get fed up. People are so rude to teens and expect them to be polite in return. People group them together as though they are all lazy. And worst of all the marketing of trash to teens by big business is just appalling. The truth is since bikinis came out big in the seventies and girls started wearing t-shirts over them, many teens have looked for decent yet youthful clothing and often it is really hard to find.

Posted by: hippie at December 18, 2007 1:21 PM


Patricia, are you telling me that every teenager or person you see on the street, you base your opinion of them based on how they dress?? Are you saying that a person can't wear certain things because the world will think a certain thing about them?

Posted by: Jodes at December 18, 2007 1:15 PM

I don't know about Patricia, but I absolutely think that. I'm not talking about "Goth" people because truthfully I think they put some effort into their look. (I love Vixen and Kint(?) on The Amazing Race!) And normally they are not dressed immodestly. But if I and my children have to look at the smut on your t-shirt that you think is "witty" then yes, I can form an instantaneous opinion of you. And I'm betting I'm not far off.

Posted by: Kristen at December 18, 2007 1:23 PM


Hippie, I've got to disagree with you there. I know plenty of teens that are great. They work hard, volunteer, are polite, helpful, etc. The problem is I know just as many who are completely the opposite. It's another instance of taking responsibility for your own actions. People are rude all the time, I don't behave rudely in return. Since when does someone's bad behavior justify my behaving badly? I realize that is more of a maturity issue than anything else but some of these kids aren't even attempting civility.

And as far as clothing is concerned Old Navy and the Gap have t-shirts and jeans and I haven't seen anything untoward written on them. There are plenty of clothes out there; the problem is in the choosing.

Posted by: Kristen at December 18, 2007 1:30 PM


"But if I and my children have to look at the smut on your t-shirt that you think is "witty" then yes, I can form an instantaneous opinion of you. And I'm betting I'm not far off."

I think you'd be looking too hard to find something that isn't there. Again, it's just a t-shirt and does no harm unless you let it.

Posted by: Stephanie at December 18, 2007 1:31 PM


Kristen
of course you think you are not far off, because having made that instant opinion, you wouldn't ever talk to the person to find out.

And I really don't see any smut there.

I think it's kinda funny that you think it's ok to base an opinion COMPLETELY on a t-shirt, but children and teenagers, and people in general, are told that not judge a book by its cover.

It's hard to tell what kind of message you are trying to send kids..."Don't judge them by how they look...unless they wear something you don't like"

Posted by: Jodes at December 18, 2007 1:33 PM


Kristen, I am not up-to-date on American law, but if you deny food to a minor, for the simple basis of the clothes they wear, can't they go to the police and charge you with child endangerment?

(p.s. that's half sarcastic, and half a real question)

Posted by: Jodes at December 18, 2007 1:18 PM

No, it's not. I'm not putting them in a cage and starving them. And if they have the money to buy the garbage clothing (because I certainly am not buying it) they can buy their own food. The solution will come when they decide it's better to wear a regular t-shirt than to buy their own food, which is what eventually happens. (Or it's better to be able to drive the car, or have friends over, or whatever the punishment was...)

Posted by: Kristen at December 18, 2007 1:34 PM


Kristen, thanks, I really wasn't totally sure about that one.

Posted by: Jodes at December 18, 2007 1:38 PM


Yes, Jodes, I am saying that a person can't wear certain things because the world will think a certain thing about them. I firmly believe our clothes Do say alot about who we are. If you mean, am I going to judge the down and out person on the street - well, no! There are obvious exceptions. However, there are alot of inappropriate shirts out there- the sayings are rude, crude, and sometimes disgusting. Most of the time these items are worn for their shock value. Stitches and Bluenotes both carry t-shirts that I won't let my girls wear. When you wear a piece of clothing, a person needs to mindful of what its purpose is. Clothing covers the body and is a statement about ourselves whether you like it or not.
My son, under NO circumstance should have worn that shirt. It shouldn't have even been in his wardrobe. PERIOD It was rude and crude and it projected an image about himself that was not true. He bought it to "fit in", to be "cool". He is a sweet, shy, fellow, with a good heart but he used the shirt to portray a side that doesn't exist. Therefore, he was not being true to himself. Please don't go into the whole punk/gothic thing because that's a whole other can of worms!! :-)

Posted by: Patricia at December 18, 2007 1:39 PM


It's hard to tell what kind of message you are trying to send kids..."Don't judge them by how they look...unless they wear something you don't like"

Posted by: Jodes at December 18, 2007 1:33 PM

Well I have never told my children that. If fact the opposite. You've heard the saying "You never get a second chance to make a first impression." You are correct that a teen is a person, but one that thinks it's okay to wear this kind of garbage is not one that I would want my children to be around.

Now if I saw a teen dressed in jeans and a normal t-shirt my first impression is that they are okay. They may prove me right or wrong from there but the fact of the matter is how you present yourself says a lot about you, like it or not.

Posted by: Kristen at December 18, 2007 1:43 PM


Mike,

Regarding your story about the young woman on the cell phone, it reminds me of a story I read in a local weekly community news paper. The kind of paper that is free in the lobby of casual restaurants. Anyway they gave awards at the end of the year for best Italian restaurant and best Burger joint, theatre etc. Then there was a category called Personal Best. A lady needed a job and was hired as a dressing room attendant at a fancy strip club. She said she was a christian and really wasn't sure she belonged in a place like that. She was 50 plus years without special skills so she didn't have a lot of employment options. She told about how she worked with women that people often looked down on and how she listened to them and cared for them and how they cried on her shoulder. She talked about how some worked their way out of that life got educated and some became christians. The most touching part of the story was when she said that her kids were boys and she didn't have a daughter of her own so all the young women at the club were like her daughters. She didn't see them as nasty or cheap. She saw them as beautiful and special people who just needed someone to love them and accept them and believe in them.

The next time you see a young woman like the one on the cell phone, maybe take a minute to think how you would feel if she were your daughter. Would you still love her and care and let her cry on your shoulder? I mean even though she obviously doesn't know better, she still says she cares for the friend she calls "stupid". If she had had different experiences, she might feel differently about the value of a child's life. You could be one of those different experiences.

Posted by: hippie at December 18, 2007 1:47 PM


Patricia, I appreciate your views (even if I disagree with them) and am not going to change your mind. That seems obvious.
All I'm saying is that how can you tell people not to judge others on how they look, but you can judge them on how they dress? Isn't that the same thing?

I do agree that there are some shirts that go too far...but that's true with anything...theres always someone who goes too far...
But, people wear these t-shirts for different reasons...

For example, I have a t-shirt which says "Beware of my wiener" and has a picture of a wiener dog on it...obviously, that's not the "intended" message, but i wear it...why? because I own a wiener dog, and love him, and I think it's funny, as does my mom.
Do other people get the wrong message? Probably. But do I wear it to be vulgar? No.

And that's why you may not like the shirt, may not agree with it, but should you judge me for it?

Posted by: Jodes at December 18, 2007 1:49 PM


Well, all I can say Jodes, is that I do judge to some degree people based on what they wear. It's part of the total package they are putting forth. Unless your dog is with you when you wear that shirt (and I've seen it at the mall), it does send subtle messages whether you admit to it or not.
I'm a librarian and I deal with all kinds of people all day long. My job as an info services librarian is to help them, no matter what they're wearing! I see each as a person made in the image of God and for each I do my best. Still I can't help feeling a little sad when I see a young person in something that doesn't express the dignity of their person.
Scenario: your daughter's friend shows up at your house wearing a shirt that says "Still a virgin? I can fix that." How would you feel about sending her out for the evening with this guy?

Posted by: Patricia at December 18, 2007 2:03 PM


Jodes,

And that's why you may not like the shirt, may not agree with it, but should you judge me for it?

Posted by: Jodes at December 18, 2007 1:49 PM

When someone calls you "shorty" and you say you don't like it but they do it anyway, you judge them as rude and that they are trying to offend you.

When someone uses bad language, they know it is likely to offend.

When someone wears t-shirts with off color humor, they also know it is likely to offend.

When you do something that you know will possibly offend someone, you know you will be judged.

Why say please and thank you, or hold the door or elevator?

Everyone knows the deal in the culture they live in.
You know you will be judged just like you have a problem with someone judging you. You know the deal.

Posted by: Anonymous at December 18, 2007 2:04 PM


Patricia...That depends.
Have I met him before? If so, then probably not, if I'm ok with his personality.
If not, then I would be wary that this is the impression he choses to give...but, I would think that I would have raised my daughter to have a good judge of character, and I would trust her.

Sure, I probably wouldn't be sure of this person, but if you raised your children, you should be trusting their friends.

Posted by: Jodes at December 18, 2007 2:09 PM


Anon,

I completely agree.

We know what kind of society we live in...and to say that people don't judge others based on their appearance is just naive and silly. Everybody does it..and if you say you don't..you're lying. I'm not saying we SHOULD do this, but it is a fact of life here.

Posted by: Elizabeth at December 18, 2007 2:17 PM


Jodes,

People, especially teens, misjudge people's character and true intentions all the time. It is your job as a parent with more experience in dealing with people to keep them away from the bad things AND bad people that ARE out there to destroy your children just for being good people.

Patricia,

I would slam the door in that guy's face..THAT is what I would do.

Posted by: Elizabeth at December 18, 2007 2:20 PM


Aye, there's the rub, Jodes! "...I would be wary that this is the impression he choses to give.." Precisely, in other words, by wearing the t-shirt, that IS the impression he's giving. If I knew him beforehand, then I would definitely call him in on the shirt. And, he wouldn't go out with my daughter till he lost the shirt. and he wouldn't go out alone with her until I got to know him ALOT better!

Posted by: Patricia at December 18, 2007 2:28 PM


Don't we also have A&F to thank for marketing the delightful
trend of sagging to the knees pants, with boxers
showing above in all their glory?

Posted by: lesforlife at December 18, 2007 10:31 AM
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Why yes!
Abercrombie and Fitch is responsible for all cutting-edge gangsta culture. (At least they were until Fitch was gunned down in an ugly drive-by incident.)

Posted by: Laura at December 18, 2007 1:04 PM

Ha! Hilarious, Laura. Thanks for the laugh. : D

Seriously, if Jill was on Busted Tees and that was the most offensive t-shirt she could find, she must not have looked too hard. Sure, it's stupid and far from funny, but compared to a lot of stuff there it's just stupid.

Posted by: samantha at December 18, 2007 2:31 PM


Holy crap batman! $50.00-60.00 for a pair of jeans?! $15.00 for a thin t-shirt!?! Gaahh.

Posted by: Stephanie at December 18, 2007 2:46 PM


I've paid more than that for a pair of jeans

::blushes::

Posted by: midnite678 at December 18, 2007 3:26 PM


I don't own a pair of jeans that cost less than $50! I am hard to fit, however. That's my excuse! :)

Posted by: samantha at December 18, 2007 3:30 PM


That's my excuse as well Samantha. I was blessed/cursed with long legs. Good for being a ballerina, not so good when it comes to buying jeans :P

Posted by: midnite678 at December 18, 2007 3:35 PM


I've been blessed/cursed with really long legs as well, unfortunately I wasn't given any dance talent to go along with them!

Posted by: samantha at December 18, 2007 3:43 PM


Actually, be thankful!

I have knee, ankle, and hip problems from my sixteen years of ballet. If basically ruined my body. My hips pop out of place, my right knee will gie out on me while I am merely walking to class, and my ankles "pop" when I move them. And I have arthritis in my all those joints as well.

Seriously, be thankful you did not dance.

Posted by: midnite678 at December 18, 2007 3:46 PM


I would slam the door in that guy's face..THAT is what I would do.

Posted by: Elizabeth at December 18, 2007 2:20 PM
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

One of my local Mormon congregations doesn't allow unwed mothers in their fold.
We know what women like THAT do. Certainly you don't mind a little door slammin'?

Posted by: Laura at December 18, 2007 4:14 PM


Laura,

blah blah blah. I personally don't care what anybody thinks of me or my "unwed mother" status. The problem is their's, not mine.

Midnite,

Where did you study ballet at?

Posted by: Elizabeth at December 18, 2007 4:22 PM


Midnite,

My ankles also pop when I move them...although sometimes it feels like more of a crunching sensation. That can't be good. My hips pop a ridiculous amount. YAY dance!

Posted by: Elizabeth at December 18, 2007 4:24 PM


I think it's ironic that we're having a discussion on whether it's OK to discriminate against someone based on appearance - a thread perched right on top of one where an 11-year first responder got fired for calling someone fat.

Either it's OK to slam someone based on their appearance or it isn't. Decide.

Posted by: Laura at December 18, 2007 4:26 PM


IT IS A T-SHIRT! Seriously GET OVER IT PEOPLE!

Posted by: JM at December 18, 2007 4:27 PM


Elizabeth,

I started out at the Dance Center in Bluff Park, I then danced at the Birmingham Ballet Academy. I actually got offered a job at the Montgomery Ballet, but decided last minute to go to college instead.

Posted by: midnite678 at December 18, 2007 4:29 PM


I also think its ludicrous to tell a kid, you buy that shirt you can buy your own food. I'm sorry but that is the stupidest thing i ever heard. I wore a t-shirts that said "get leid island style" and guess what.... i turned out just fine.

Posted by: JM at December 18, 2007 4:30 PM


Midnite,

Do you go to college for dance?

Posted by: Elizabeth at December 18, 2007 4:36 PM


I understand that parents should have a say in things while the individual is living "under their roof" but at the same time to tell them they can "buy their own food" or kick them out because they buy a shirt that parent does not agree with is ridiculous.

Posted by: JM at December 18, 2007 4:36 PM


"I also think its ludicrous to tell a kid, you buy that shirt you can buy your own food. I'm sorry but that is the stupidest thing i ever heard"

thats what I'm going to tell my boys, they ain't that crap out of the house

"I wore a t-shirts that said "get leid island style" and guess what.... i turned out just fine."

yea, nice. I would've grounded you for a week young lady.

Posted by: jasper at December 18, 2007 4:37 PM


JM,

What is so ludicrous about it? As a parent, you make rules, the kid doesn't follow them..there are consequences. It's how you teach them to function in society. If your kid has a job and enough money to buy that shirt, then they have enough money to buy their own food or cook for themselves. I don't see why I should have to support every single thing my kid wants to do, especially if I object to it. Yeah, it's "just a shirt" but where does the line get drawn then? You give em an inch and they'll take a mile I tell ya! LOL..gosh I sound like my mom!

Posted by: Elizabeth at December 18, 2007 4:39 PM


Elizabeth:

No, I kind of wish I would have now that I look back on everything. I miss ballet more than anything, and just out right quitting is the one thing I regret in my life.

But I quit almost five years ago, and in ballet standards, I am "large" (aka I have a butt and curves now), and I am extremely out of shape. So I dont think I could pick it back up even if I really wanted to. Oh well.

Posted by: midnite678 at December 18, 2007 4:40 PM


I know how you feel midnite...I really miss it when I go watch my brothers in the dance studio with all their dance clothes on and stuff. I loved taking class.That was the best..even more so than performing. But taking dance in college isn't as good. I swear my technique went WAY down my freshman year of college, just because it isn't nearly as intense.

Posted by: Elizabeth at December 18, 2007 4:43 PM


I haven't taken dance in about 2 1/2 years...I taught for a little while when I was pregnant, but I had to stop because it was too much strain on my body. I would be considered "large" now too. I have hips :gasp:

Posted by: Elizabeth at December 18, 2007 4:45 PM


Yeah, I ran into my ballet instructor about seven months ago, and he looked me right in the eyes and said "Ashley, you've gotten fat".

I about died. I though it was a good thing that I had curves, and didnt look sickly (aka anorexic). I didnt hit 100 pounds until I was almost 18.

Oh well, to each their own.

Posted by: midnite678 at December 18, 2007 4:47 PM


Me either, The most I weighed before having my daughter was 108 pounds. People like me much better now since I look like I actually eat. I used to eat ALL THE TIME before too though which was funny.

Posted by: Elizabeth at December 18, 2007 4:49 PM


Oh, I know exactly what you mean. I could eat a whole large pizza by myself in high school (more than my male friends) & they didnt understand how I did it or where it went. My nickname was "tooth-pick" until senior year.

The first year I didnt dance, I kept eating the way I normally did (bad mistake), and I ballooned up. So I lost a little weight, and weigh about 120, which is almost obese in the ballet world, hahahaha.

At least I dont have to listen to my doctor lecture me about eating habbits and yell at me about being extremely underweight anymore :-)

But I am torn in one area, I had nicely toned abs (which are gone) but now I actually have a butt. I dont know which I like more, b/c with one, I cant have the other, lol.

Posted by: midnite678 at December 18, 2007 4:53 PM


OK, I am to my painting class! Good night everyone!

Posted by: midnite678 at December 18, 2007 5:04 PM


Haha Midnite, I know exactly what you mean!!

Posted by: Elizabeth at December 18, 2007 5:04 PM


Listen to you two skinny minnies....

I've always been thin, but never "dancer thin". I weighed barely 100 pounds in 8th grade (but got made fun of because I was also very tall, so I had the WORST nicknames). I had no...curves...of any type, but now, I'm proud to say I'm the happy owner of a big butt, hips, and other feminine attributes. *giggles*

But it's not because I stopped dancing (I stopped competitively running...got injured a few years ago at the state cross country meet and never got back into running full-time again). That, and the food here at school is actually really good. Unfortunately for me. Lol.

Posted by: Lyssie at December 18, 2007 5:14 PM


Midnite,

Hey, you are the only other person I have heard say that her hips pop out. I thought I was the only one. I only did a little bit of dance as a kid. Do you really think that is what does it?

Posted by: hippie at December 18, 2007 6:09 PM


"I think it's ironic that we're having a discussion on whether it's OK to discriminate against someone based on appearance - a thread perched right on top of one where an 11-year first responder got fired for calling someone fat."

So very true. And it's not like wearing a t-shirt will drastically decrease the quality and quantity of your life.

No, you know what? Go ahead and be fat. Just don't complain when people call you fat.

Posted by: Jess at December 18, 2007 7:12 PM


Like have any of you seen that new burger king comercial? "I can't have my huge stupid burger? I'll Die!!!"

Posted by: Jess at December 18, 2007 7:15 PM


Laura said: "an 11-year first responder got fired for calling someone fat."

No, he got fired for being a dumb Polack (remember, I'm allowed to say that! But if you don't have Polish blood and you say it, it's a HATE CRIME!!!).

JM said: "IT IS A T-SHIRT! Seriously GET OVER IT PEOPLE!"

So... what exactly does screaming what the object in question is have to do with anything? If Mike Huckabee says something you don't like, should I just scream 'IT IS A PRESIDENTIAL CANDIDATE! Seriously GET OVER IT JM!', will that be the end of the discussion?

Posted by: John Lewandowski at December 18, 2007 8:56 PM


Jess, simply being call fat is different than being called fat by a hysterical, insane dumb Polack with a gun (potentially).

Posted by: John Lewandowski at December 18, 2007 8:59 PM


Does anyone have a citation for Jill's assertion that "young males most support abortion"? I'd like to see that. Thank you.

Posted by: anonymous at December 18, 2007 9:19 PM


And he was prodding her in the shoulder with his finger I believe. So that makes it different than somebody just calling you "fat." They're also touching your person without permission while verbally harrassing you.

Posted by: Elizabeth at December 18, 2007 9:20 PM


http://www.tmz.com/2007/12/18/jamie-lynn-spears-is-pregnant/

Story of interest?

Posted by: Stephanie at December 18, 2007 10:20 PM


I wore a t-shirts that said "get leid island style" and guess what.... i turned out just fine.

Posted by: JM at December 18, 2007 4:30 PM

That's debatable.

Posted by: Anonymous at December 18, 2007 11:16 PM


Jodes,

What do you think when you see a person wearing a "Choose Life" t-shirt?

How would you feel if someone came to your mother's funeral in a peekaboo nightie?

What if they came to your wedding wearing a t-shirt that said "I screwed the bride...and she was great!"


Words are powerful. Image is powerful. What we wear says a lot about who we are. It speaks volumes about how that person views others.

There are dress codes for restaurants. For church. For school. Nuns wear habits, police wear uniforms, hookers dress provocatively. Priests wear a collar, Transexuals wear the opposite genders clothing, clowns wear colorful outfits and we wear black when someone dies. Brides wear white, nudists wear nothing, members of PETA don't wear fur, Nazis wear swastikas.

What we wear is an expression of ourselves. The words on those T-shirts are only funny because they strike a chord. They "reflect" our thoughts and attitudes. The A&F shirts only make sense if you understand what they imply. Not what's said, but what isn't. That's the point of humor. Using words in a way that an image is evoked.

To say "They are only t-shirts" is denying the power of words...

Obviously, the words you choose to wear will tell the world what and how you think. Why would you wear "words" that you disagree with?

Posted by: mk at December 19, 2007 6:13 AM


As for comparing T-shirt wearers to "fat" people.

If a person is slightly overweight, it's possible that you are the one with an image problem (see midnites post about "getting fat"...)as we are obsessed as a society with looking as much like 12 year old girls as possible...

But if you are seriously obese then you probably suffer from an addiction and deal with issues of self esteem, self worth and self loathing on a daily basis. You'd probably give your right arm to be able to take off the extra pounds as easily as someone could take off their T-shirt.

Choosing to wear a certain T-shirt takes all of 3 seconds, while battling obesity is a life long war.

Judging someone on something that it would be as easy as breathing to change is much different than judging someone on something that they might very desperately want to change, but can't.

To compare the two is heartless. To make fun of someone that is fat says more about you than the person with the weight problem.

Perhaps there are souls like Emeril, who embrace their size, but for most people being overweight is a painful, wrenching experience. Wearing a crude T-shirt isn't causing the wearer to cry themselves to sleep at night or avoid looking in a mirror.

Posted by: mk at December 19, 2007 7:01 AM


This is the third t-shirt entry in a week. Honestly. I know I'm just going to be labeled another "liberal pro-abort" (spare me, please), but it has to be said... for about the fiftieth time: it... is... just... a... t-shirt. Get over it.

Posted by: Leah at December 19, 2007 8:04 AM


geez, your smart MK.

Posted by: jasper at December 19, 2007 8:11 AM



Either it's OK to slam someone based on their appearance or it isn't. Decide.

Posted by: Laura at December 18, 2007 4:26 PM

This statement attempts to equate two unequal things. For example anyone who meets me can see I am a middle aged woman. I can wear an offensive shirt that has "f u" on it or a solid color shirt.

If someone calls me an old bag just because I am over 40, I think that is pretty rude. However if they don't want to hire me because of the "f u" on the t-shirt, it is not my appearance they are judging, it is my attitude.

Posted by: hippie at December 19, 2007 8:24 AM


Hippie:

Sorry for just now replying. Busy and night and work has been slammed since I got here an hour ago.

My hip pops out of plave b/c I took ballet and gymnastics almost all of my life and I am double jointed in almost every joint. So, I am assuming it's from a mixture of those three things.

Posted by: midnite678 at December 19, 2007 9:59 AM


Young males most support abortion

Jill, I am not sure I can agree with this statement. There are many young men you do not support abortion. We should not generalize them in such way, it only drives them away.

Posted by: Vlad at December 19, 2007 11:31 AM


Vlad, no offense... Why avoid speaking truth? If a man is truly against abortion, he will not stop being against abortion, just because Jill Stanek posted the truth about men in their age group. If anything, it will strengthen their resolve to fight abortion even more. If not, they never were truly against abortion in the first place, and certainly not for the right reasons.


Posted by: Bethany at December 19, 2007 1:18 PM


And I agree with you, by the way. There are many young men who do not support abortion. But there are many young men who do, and Jill's point (at least, I think this was her point, I could be wrong) was that the ones most likely to "benefit" from abortion, would be young men. This isn't to say that "most men love abortion", but rather that they are the age group and gender who are more likely to desire or support abortions. Hope that clears it up a bit. I think I wasn't clear enough in the first post.

Posted by: Bethany at December 19, 2007 1:27 PM


Bethany,

I am not so much concerned with men who are currently against abortion. I just think that those claiming that they are pro-abortion- are not pro-abortion at all. We just need to talk and listen..... Call me a pacifist but I think we can do better job educating those men who claim to be pro-abortion. For the most part we just give up on them, and they in turn give up on us as well.

I seem to be causing way too much commotion here, I better keep quiet... lol. What Jill is doing here is great, some good discussions are taking place. She is able to keep the issue in fornt of politicians and activists.

If there ate 13 years old girls obtaining abortions, it is quiet possible for 13 old boys to be fathers of those babies. I think the issue has not been studied enough. I also think the liberal media has lot to do with portraying young males as being mostly pro-abortion.

Posted by: Vlad at December 19, 2007 1:36 PM


No I agree...I do not believe that the majority of males are against abortion. (I could be wrong ). But I think the point here was just that the ones most likely to benefit from abortion are young males, because they are the ones most likely to be desiring casual, irresponsible sex. But that is not to say that others are not responsible, anti abortion people. (my husband, for instance, has always been a very responsible man, and is anti-abortion)

I think that most of Jill's posts are here to educate men, as well as women, so please, in all kindness, do not assume that she is here to condemn them and not to help. She has many, many times posted about post abortive men, and the pain they have to endure. She has posted about men who have fought to stop abortion, etc. She knows that there are men who do not like abortion.

I'm not offended, so don't feel like you have to post less. I just want you to understand this. We have been able to, with love and kindness, help convert people to pro-life on this blog...our techniques are working. We have seen the results and we want to continue working to save lives in the best way we know how.

Posted by: Bethany at December 19, 2007 2:09 PM


Bethany,

I am new here and as you may know some times when the discussions heat up it is hard to figure out who is pro-life and who is pro-choice...

In fact I was called Satan by, I am guessing, one of the moderators. The entire things was just big misunderstanding however it did left some what bitter "aftertaste" in my mouth, figuratively speaking.

On unrelated subject. I am guessing you are one of the moderators as well. I have been involved in internet marketing for last few years, I have some minor suggestions that may actually increase this blogs visibility on the internet. But I am guessing from the number of comments you are not struggling in terms of visitors. E-mail me if you would like to hear what I have to say at vladzablotskyy at gmail dot com.

Posted by: Vlad at December 19, 2007 2:25 PM


"In fact I was called Satan by, I am guessing, one of the moderators."

I didn't call you satan, I said satan was speaking through you. I apologized. Grow up and get over it.

Posted by: jasper at December 19, 2007 2:46 PM


I posted the comment below on a wrong thread:


Jasper,

I also have witnessed you addressed some one with a four letter word. I have to say you were very quick to edit your comment once you realized your mistake- but you never now who is watching.

Posted by: Vlad at December 19, 2007 2:55 PM


I also have witnessed you addressed some one with a four letter word. I have to say you were very quick to edit your comment once you realized your mistake- but you never now who is watching.

What exactly is your point, Vlad? Maybe I'm overreacting, but it seems like you are being a little passive aggressive to the pro-life members here. Why, instead of attacking the way we post, why not attack pro-abortion ideals instead? It would be much more worthwhile, in my opinion. I do not understand why your only posts here serve to teach us how to behave. I haven't seen you posting anything about abortion, just about how you see problems with the ways pro-lifers are handling things.

If Jasper posted something in haste, then deleted it, obviously he was remorseful, or he wouldn't have deleted it. And he has apologized to you at least 4 times for his remark towards you, and you won't seem to let it go. I don't understand why this is, if you're all about forgiveness. Why can you forgive abortionists, yet you cannot forgive one of your own?

Posted by: Bethany at December 19, 2007 3:04 PM


On unrelated subject. I am guessing you are one of the moderators as well. I have been involved in internet marketing for last few years, I have some minor suggestions that may actually increase this blogs visibility on the internet. But I am guessing from the number of comments you are not struggling in terms of visitors. E-mail me if you would like to hear what I have to say at vladzablotskyy at gmail dot com.

Thanks, I appreciate the offer...I don't own tis site though..a better person to talk to would probably be Jill. :) You can contact her by clicking the contact button at the top of the page! :)

Posted by: Bethany at December 19, 2007 3:08 PM


Thank you Bethany!!! I totaly agree with your 3:04 post. And no, you are not overreacting.

Posted by: Carrie at December 19, 2007 3:52 PM


What exactly is your point, Vlad? Maybe I'm overreacting, but it seems like you are being a little passive aggressive to the pro-life members here.

You are overreacting. But not to worry.... this to shall pass :)

Some times we just have to agree to disagree.... and to finally part our ways. Hopefully for good now. lol Yes I know, said that before before you jump all over me

Posted by: Vlad at December 19, 2007 3:58 PM


Carrie, I appreciate knowing I'm not the only one who felt that way.

Posted by: Bethany at December 19, 2007 3:59 PM


Bethany, I thought I was the only one that felt that way until I read your post.

Posted by: Carrie at December 19, 2007 4:43 PM


Dang, Jill, after this past week maybe it's time for you to sell your Abercrombie & Fitch stock....

Doug

Posted by: Doug at December 19, 2007 4:52 PM