Planned Parenthoods in the State of Texas have been drying up and blowing away like tumbleweeds since the legislature began shutting off the funding spigot in 2011. Since last May a lucky 13 mills have closed (12 plus 1).

So a $500,000 donation to Planned Parenthood would seem like a gift from, well, hell.

But the United States’ largest abortion provider has its standards.

That’s actually not the reason Planned Parenthood of Dallas rejected a half million dollar gift from bestselling author Tucker Max, who coincidentally wrote, I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell, among other books I’ve never heard of but would be well suited for any Planned Parenthood library, such as Sloppy Seconds and A**holes Finish First.