Stanek Sunday funnies 3-31-13
Here are my top five favorite political cartoons this week. Vote for your favorite in the poll at the bottom of the post.
by Chip Bok at GoComics.com…
by Henry Payne at Townhall.com (yes, it’s true)…
by Gary Varvel at Townhall.com…
by Bob Gorrell at Townhall.com…
by Michael Ramirez at Townhall.com…
Mar.31, 2013 7:39 am |
Cartoons |
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Jill Stanek is a nurse turned speaker, columnist and blogger, a national figure in the effort to protect both preborn and postborn innocent human life.
Tired of the gay marriage arguments and the dishonest attempts to equate gay marriage with abortion.
Happy Easter, everyone!
JackBorsch says: March 31, 2013 at 10:33 am “Tired of the gay marriage arguments and the dishonest attempts to equate gay marriage with abortion.”
JackBorsch,
Your comment is rather vague. What do you mean by “Tired of the gay marriage arguments?”
What do you mean by ” … the dishonest attempts to equate gay marriage with abortion?”
William, I believe Jack is expressing what it feels like from his perspective; being in the uncommon position of being a liberal who against abortion.
Gay marriage and abortion have something huge in common: Both are pushing unnatural enthusiasms against reality.
Marriage and Children are the essence of the Human Family. The Family is the basic building block of every human culture, including our own.
We are committing cultural suicide by contraception, divorce, abortion, and lately by alternate definitions of marriage. That is the relationship between same-sex pseudo-marriage and abortion.
” Your comment is rather vague. What do you mean by “Tired of the gay marriage arguments?”
What do you mean by ” … the dishonest attempts to equate gay marriage with abortion?””
Honestly, I find it rather gross that people take away from the cause of ending abortion (which has killed millions and millions of non-consenting people) by acting like it’s somehow comparable to homosexuality and gay marriage in particular (which has the end result of…. people getting married).
“Gay marriage and abortion have something huge in common: Both are pushing unnatural enthusiasms against reality.
Marriage and Children are the essence of the Human Family. The Family is the basic building block of every human culture, including our own. ”
Now see, you’re comparing slaughtering millions of babies to people having sex and being in a relationship you don’t you don’t like, to be blunt. It’s a false equivalence, at best.
Homosexuality doesn’t appear to be “unnatural”, most researchers think it has a biological if not genetic basis.
And gay people have families too. Their family structures are perfectly valid. My sister lives with her long-term girlfriend and her adopted daughter. But of course, they can’t get married and her girlfriend can’t have the same parental rights as my sister because of people like you insisting that they aren’t a family.
“William, I believe Jack is expressing what it feels like from his perspective; being in the uncommon position of being a liberal who against abortion.”
Lol, I don’t even think I’m all that liberal, I think I just appear more left than I am compared to yall.
But it is frustrating to see that all this focus on gay people takes away from the fight against abortion and alienates the entire LGBT community and most liberals from our cause.
For those of you who will my daughter Melody survived childhood leukemia ALL. She’s 21 now and going to school to be a pharmacist . She just found out she has cancer again . Id appreciate prayers. It doesn’t look good.
Clinging to the lord for strength what more can I do?
Hi Heather,
What tragic news. You have certainly had your share. My thoughts and best wishes are with you. Have you thought of an alternative doctor at all? Intravenous Vit.C has been found to be toxic to cancer cells, while doing no harm to the patient. Its the first thing I would do. Don’t expect to hear that from your doctor, you have to do your own research.
Heather I’m so sorry. I don’t know what to say.
The family is the basic human building block in every culture, though throughout history every culture has had its own definition of family. In some its one man, several wives, concubines. Others its one woman, several husbands. Among royalty, the nobility, and the wealthy, and the political class marriages were strictly business and political arrangements, with extramarital dalliances to be expected.
Throughout history parents would be killed and children kidnapped to help repopulate a diminishing tribe. Children would be sold into slavery by their parents. Even now children are sold into sexual slavery to help support their families.
In one area of China is an ethnic group that is quite sexually promiscuous though the legally married couple are the children’s parents, they may not be the biological ones.
BTW, actresses Elizabeth Taylor and Judy Garland were the children of gay fathers. I was the child of a sociopathic heterosexual one. Which is worse?
Let’s dispense with any idyllic notion of marriage and family.
Hi Jack.
What I’m certain your sister can do is designate her partner as the child’s legal guardian should anything happen to your sister. Also, be certain they have powers of attorney for health care and durable powers of attorney to manage each others health care decisions, financial and legal matters in the event one or the other is incapacitated. My daugher who works in estate planning has drawn up many such plans for gay couples. Your sister and her partner, even if not married, can still take the necessary legal steps to protect themselves and their daughter and should do so ASAP.
Thanks to all. The truth is nothing can be done. What is meant to happen will happen
Hi Heather,
I hope you will look into my suggestion.
Life is going to throw things our way. My choice is to give it to God. He is the author of life and death…not I. I can’t worry about things out of my control . I’ve eliminating woulda coulda n shoulda from my vocabulary. why? Because i can’t change what IS. I’ve spoken of her hospitalization and that’s what they found. I must carry on to keep my sanity. But we must stop killing our children.
But thank you all for caring and concern. It means the world to me.
Also Jack,
You would be wise to do the same. Your children could end up in foster care or with guardians you don’t want unless you designated legal guardians. Assume nothing. Also, designate who would manage your financial and legal affairs and make your health decisions were you unable.
Otherwise a court will make those decisions for you.
I’ve been married to the same man for 36 years and I have it all in writing as to who will be my POAs. One can take nothing for granted.
Hi Mary I will :)
Heather I hope you have people around you to help you while this is going on. :( Don’t hesitate to reach out to people in real life, on here, etc.
I’m going to some Easter thing at a my neighbor’s church today, if it’s cool with you I’ll have everyone pray for you?
Happy Easter to all.
Mary,
Wouldn’t my ex get automatic custody if I died? I do have a living will thing that says that they shouldn’t keep me on extraordinary life-saving measures, and that my ex-wife’s mom is the POA if I’m incapacitated. I thought that custody was a given, that my ex would just get it automatically because she’s the biological mom?
Thanks Jack by all means. Ive been blogging with people who have had it much worse than I have. One woman lost her husband 2 kids a sister and her parents. wow! We are all going to meet the end one day when the rubber meets the road. Until then we have to live out our purpose on earth until our time comes .
Jack:
The first cartoon has to do with the legal equivalence to Roe of imposing same sex marriage on the country. I do not believe it suggested moral equivalence between the two. The point is that we have already been down the social engineering road (Roe) and that the court should have learned that these questions of profound social import are best left to the will of the people as expressed through the various states.
Do you think SCOTUS should throw out the laws in all of the states that to this point do not recognize same sex marriage?
Heather:
Our prayers are with you.
” The first cartoon has to do with the legal equivalence to Roe of imposing same sex marriage on the country. I do not believe it suggested moral equivalence between the two. The point is that we have already been down the social engineering road (Roe) and that the court should have learned that these questions of profound social import are best left to the will of the people as expressed through the various states.
Do you think SCOTUS should throw out the laws in all of the states that to this point do not recognize same sex marriage?”
Well, do you think it was right that Loving v Virginia recognized the unconstitutionality of anti-miscegenation laws, basically throwing out state laws that were still in effect? It would be just as easy to compare the gay marriage case to Loving vs Virginia, the fact it’s compared to Roe v Wade is a deliberate smear and a deliberate way to equate the two as moral issues.
The fact is, if something is unconstitutional it’s going to be struck down in the Court. I don’t claim to know if it is unconstitutional to bar gay people from marrying, but I do know that it’s perfectly valid for the Supreme Court to strike down a law, no matter how much support or popularity it has, if it’s unconstitutional.
The evolution of obamacare cartoon nailed it! When proponents of the law were courting public opinion they laid out all of these fantastic scenarios (many of them out and out lies) that had people thinking this wonderful legislaton would be the answer to everyone’s health care needs. Visions of cost savings and giving the insurance industry their just deserts had people dissing the warnings of those who said things did not add up.
Reality is hitting home and it is hard to swallow. But swallow it we must to avoid the train wreck coming our way.
Jack,
Loving vs. Virginia struck down laws unjustly made to ban inter-racial marriage. We’re now talking about, in effect adding what many of us would consider to be “unjust” laws to invent same-sex “marriage”.
Jerry was right. The cartoon was showing the point made by many that all this would only make for another prolonged Roe-type fight. Killing babies is the worse of the two.
But we can walk and chew gum at the same time, and be against both these things.
Jack:
So then you are supportiive of Roe v Wade?
I was surprised when bader Ginsberg made the skim milk comment i figured shed be the biggest supporter of all
” Loving vs. Virginia struck down laws unjustly made to ban inter-racial marriage. We’re now talking about, in effect adding what many of us would consider to be “unjust” laws to invent same-sex “marriage”.”
That’s what you consider “unjust”. People who were anti-miscegenation also consider it “unjust” to allow mixed race couples to legally marry. Fortunately, pretty much all of us can look back and see that was a huge mistake and be glad it was rectified.
” Jerry was right. The cartoon was showing the point made by many that all this would only make for another prolonged Roe-type fight. Killing babies is the worse of the two.
But we can walk and chew gum at the same time, and be against both these things.”
I am personally sure the gay marriage thing would fizzle out fairly quickly if it became law of the land. It wouldn’t kill babies, the world wouldn’t collapse, even those with strong opposition would treat it like any other moral problem (in their opinion), like they treat divorce. Roe v Wade is legalized killing, it’s incomparable. The furor surrounding that decision will never die until the law dies.
” So then you are supportiive of Roe v Wade?”
Lol yeah that’s me, totally supporting Roe v Wade up in here.
Though I do think that it would be better if we could get a constitutional amendment that states that human rights are applied when the human begins to exist (at conception), it would work better in my opinion then simply overturning Roe v Wade, If we don’t do that, a few years after Roe v Wade is gone, you’ll get people challenging anti-abortion laws on the same constitutional grounds and it might even get reinstated.
I think Roe v Wade is unconstitutional anyway, there’s no due process for babies being aborted, no protection against cruel and unusual punishment, etc etc.
Hi Jack,
If you are the sole custodial parent I think it is your decision as to who will have guardianship. Would your ex-wife even want the children? Do you consider her fit to raise them? If not, then who gets them? It would be safest to discuss this with an attorney and as I said, assume nothing. Your children’s care and custody could be left up to a court.
Is your ex-wife’s mother your health care and durable POA? Have an attorney determine exactly what your POA covers. Is this the person you want making health care decisions for you and managing your financial and legal affairs should you become incapacitated? If she is and you’re happy with the arrangement fine. But keep in mind you can designate whoever you want. My husband was health and durable POA for Big Joe, a family friend who did not want his son involved in any way. You could pick any trusted relative or friend, or keep your former mother in law.
You have a living will and that’s fine, but should you be incapacitated, say a car accident or severe illness, where you couldn’t make decisions then the POAs and your children’s guardianship could become issues, especially if your recovery was long term or you were rendered legally incompetent. Without the POAs you could be assigned a guardian to make your medical and legal decisions or a family member you don’t want. A living will doesn’t guarantee this can’t happen or prevent it.
My neighbor “Mark” was seriously injured and comatose after a motorcyle accident. His wife “Bonnie” assumed she would be making his medical decisions. Not so fast. The hospital insisted on a legal guardianship! Turns out Mark has adult children from a previous marriage and why should they have any less right to make decisons for Mark than Bonnie? So in addition to the stress and trauma she was already going through, Bonnie had the hassle of going to court to obtain the guardianship. How much easier for Bonnie if Mark had had a health care POA designating Bonnie. I can understand the hospital’s demand, I’m sure they’ve been caught in some very unpleasant legal and family battles and only want to protect themselves and the patient.
My daughter has told me there are no battles more vicious than families going after each other for custody, settling old scores, control, money, property, and decision making. Whatever your circumstances, gay, straight, married, single, male, female,….assume nothing and take the necessary legal steps to protect yourself, the people you love, and what you own.
Jack:
You said: The fact is, if something is unconstitutional it’s going to be struck down in the Court. I don’t claim to know if it is unconstitutional to bar gay people from marrying, but I do know that it’s perfectly valid for the Supreme Court to strike down a law, no matter how much support or popularity it has, if it’s unconstitutional.
And then you follow up with: I think Roe v Wade is unconstitutional anyway, there’s no due process for babies being aborted, no protection against cruel and unusual punishment, etc etc.
So in Roe SCOTUS did what you say they should do: overturning laws they percieved as unconstitutional. But then it is your opinion that Roe is unconstitutional. Who is right, and whose opinion actually counts here? This is the point of the first cartoon…we might want to avoid this imbroglio. Avoid laying another Roe type egg by making a ” laws preventing same sex marriage (abortion) are unconsitutional in all states” decision.
Again, this is not a moral equivalency thing, it is a matter of legal overreach.
You said:
Heather, I will be glad to include your daughter Melody in special intentions during my daily prayers. Here are the prayers I prayed daily for my son when he was fighting cancer. I have never stopped praying them. He is was diagnosed at age 8 and is now 18.
Oh my Jesus, you who once said; seek and you shall find. Ask and you shall receive. Knock and the door shall be opened to you. Behold, I know, I seek and ask for the grace of your Father’s Holy Spirit to come down upon Melody and give her the grace to persevere through life trials. That He may send His holy angels down to visit with her always; to comfort her and to protect her. To drive Satan and all his murderous, cancerous legions of deceit and disorder far from her; and to guide her into the sacred heart of Jesus.
Our Father, who art in heaven, hallowed be thy name. Thy kingdom come, Thy will be done; on earth as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread and forgive us our trespasses; as we forgive those who trespass against us. And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil.
Hail Mary full of grace; the Lord is with thee. Blessed art thou amongst women’ and blessed is the fruit of thy womb Jesus. Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners; now and at the hour of our death.
Glory be to the Father, and to the Son, and to the Holy Spirit. As it was in the beginning, is now, and ever shall be; world without end.
Oh Sacred Heart of Jesus. I place all my trust in thee.
Oh Sacred Heart of Jesus, I place all my trust in thee.
Oh Sacred Heart of Jesus, I place all my trust in thee.
“Homosexuality doesn’t appear to be “unnatural””
Jack, seriously?
it’s not unnatural. If it were so unnatural, then why has it persisted through the ages? It’s cross cultural, and as a matter of fact, found in many species of animals. And before you run full steam ahead with the “sex is only for reproduction” argument, then just think about all of the non reproductive acts of sex that occur within heterosexual couples…
A7X, something persisting through the ages does not make it natural. Do you think abortion is natural too?
JackBorsch, just wanted to say that I personally agree with what you’re saying here.I find it disheartening when people bring the gay issue into the abortion debate. There is a lot of good information on this blog about abortion, but the anti-gay stuff alienates a lot of people who need to hear the info about abortion. There are a number of gay people out there who would be sympathetic to the pro-life view if they didn’t think it meant endorsing an anti-gay view too. That is one reason why I try to support the Prolife Alliance of Gays and Lesbians…they need all the help they can get reaching gays AND pro-lifers.
Kari, Not for me. The pro-life movement will never survive if you need to ‘win them over’ by giving something in return. If you are gay and support life then great. But if you have to support for homosexuality to get somebody to join the pro-life cause then imo they only hurt the cause. They would be called PLINO’s (Pro Life In Name Only).
Heather, actually what I posted was incorrect. My son was actually diagnosed at 6 years old and not eight.
” So in Roe SCOTUS did what you say they should do: overturning laws they percieved as unconstitutional. But then it is your opinion that Roe is unconstitutional. Who is right, and whose opinion actually counts here? This is the point of the first cartoon…we might want to avoid this imbroglio. Avoid laying another Roe type egg by making a ” laws preventing same sex marriage (abortion) are unconsitutional in all states” decision. ”
Well a Supreme Court justice’s opinion counts far more than mine or yours when it comes to whether a law is constitutional or not. I quite agree with Justice Byron White’s dissenting opinion on Roe v Wade, but the fact was not enough of the judges agreed with his dissenting opinion. We need a Court with a majority of people who agree with our view on the issue if we want to change it, and a valid case to bring before the Court. Either that or a heavily pro-life Congress, House, and state legislators so we can pass a constitutional amendment extending human rights to people before birth.
And again, I don’t claim to know if it’s unconstitutional to deny marriage inequality to gay people. I don’t know which statutes would apply to the matter, I haven’t looked into it much. SCOTUS will make that decision though, not me. I just think it’s annoying how it’s only judicial overreach if it’s laws you don’t personally agree with. I guarantee half the people upset that the Court might throw out the anti-gay marriage laws on grounds of unconstitutionality would be perfectly fine if pro-gay marriage laws were thrown out on unconstitutionality.
““Homosexuality doesn’t appear to be “unnatural””
Jack, seriously?”
Seems pretty well supported that there is some type of biological cause, if not genetic, for homosexuality. I don’t consider it “unnatural”. I think that most gay people “chose” to be gay in the same way you and I “chose” to be straight. We didn’t.
Hi TS I’ve always found your posts comforting. I’m sorry to hear you have lived the same nightmare of a child with cancer. My daughter lived in 2 hospitals for 2 years .She had to have a bone marrow transplant and many of the children on her floor died. To this day I cannot watch a St Jude commercial . I’m a nurse but I cannot look. I donate to that hospital but to think that pro abort Marlo Thomas runs it I called to make sure that absolutely nothing was to go to her abortion cause . They assured me it wouldn’t . Your post made me cry. My husband is dead and I had a very hard day coping yesterday. Now this. I don’t feel I should be exempt from tragedy .However I just don’t understand anything anymore . I am totally depressed .
“Kari, Not for me. The pro-life movement will never survive if you need to ‘win them over’ by giving something in return. If you are gay and support life then great. But if you have to support for homosexuality to get somebody to join the pro-life cause then imo they only hurt the cause. They would be called PLINO’s (Pro Life In Name Only).”
Nobody says you guys have to support homosexuality. It would be incredibly awesome if you guys stopped tying it to your pro-life position and alienating people who might be our allies though. PLAGAL gets smacked around a lot in the pro-life movement, it’s gross. If there was a movement or issues you felt strongly about, but every time you tried to get involved people told you that you were sinning by practicing Christianity, that by being a Christian you were equivalent to this horrible thing you were against, I sincerely doubt you would stick around.
I am on Facebook as well if anyone cares to befriend me. Thank you too Jerry. Do you think suicide sends us to hell?
Heather I put you on that prayer list at that church this evening. I don’t know your last name or much about you, but if God is who you all think he is then he knows a lot of people are praying for you right now. I wish I could help, I can’t imagine what you are going through.
Heather I don’t think there is a biblical justification for people going to hell just for committing suicide, which probably doesn’t mean much coming from me but I did find this: http://carm.org/questions/other-questions/if-christian-commits-suicide-he-still-forgiven.
If you are feeling suicidal though you should talk to someone who can help you though, I know that suicidal ideation can be completely overwhelming and make it hard to reach out, but there are people who care and can help. Maybe someone at your church or a family member that you trust? You can email me if you want to vent, I probably won’t know what to say but I will listen: Ask Carla the mod for my email address. I am really worried about you and I do care.
Edited by mod to protect your privacy Jack. :)
Hello Heather, going through my son getting cancer was the hardest thing I have ever been through. He had non-Hodgkins large T-cell lymphoma. Going into clinic every week for chemo and and spinal taps etc was rough. One thing that struck me was seeing kids I met there dying and new faces coming in week after week. It is still going on every day while we get caught up in the rat race and never even give a thought. That taught me to keep my guard up against the scourge of cancer and my weapon is prayer.
At one point when the prognosis was at it’s worst I broke down and asked God if he could take me instead. He almost did. All the depression and drinking nearly killed me. Then I quit drinking to try and get away and instead I used to spend so much time praying. I remember that I wouldn’t want to pray for anybody but my son cause I thought it would ‘water down’ my prayers and spread them too thin. I talked with my mother about it and she said “no need to worry about that, Jesus has big shoulders”.
” If you are the sole custodial parent I think it is your decision as to who will have guardianship. Would your ex-wife even want the children? Do you consider her fit to raise them? If not, then who gets them? It would be safest to discuss this with an attorney and as I said, assume nothing. Your children’s care and custody could be left up to a court.”
I think that my will or wishes would be taken into account as the custodial parent, but I do believe it would be pretty easy for my ex to override any of my wishes after I am gone. As the mother her rights are pretty well protected, especially since she hasn’t been abusive towards them. I would rather have her parents have full custody if I were gone (which considering how little she enjoys parenting, it would probably happen that way anyway). But you might be right, I should talk to a lawyer about it. The last thing I would want is someone in my family getting my kids, or them in foster care, if something happened to me. And your points about a POA and legal guardianship are valid, I should look into that. I don’t want my parents to have legal control over me at all if I were incapacitated, and they might try. I much prefer my ex wife’s mom to make those decisions, she is a good person and I believe she would respect my wishes as much as possible.
Thanks Jack and TS…We take so much for granted when we are in good health. I think we sometimes think “Oh no that won’t happen to me it happens to the other guy.” Well here we are. I went to the cemetery 2 days ago to my husband’s grave site. A friend of mine went with me. There was a stone with 3 pictures etched into a stone. Different ages…same date of death. Maybe an accident or a fire? I thought how awful . I generally don’t go to cemeteries because they depress me. I’ve been to my fathers grave once and left a wreck. He died in 96 but it was expected . He had cancer . I just can’t make sense of anything anymore . I don’t know if I could kill myself but the ideations are coming and going . I appreciate the prayers. It just seems that when I pray anymore it gets worse.
Jack I’ve taken your email ty. TS yes I also pleaded with God to give it to me. Heck give it to me now. It doesn’t work that way. I’ve known many people who have indeed grieved themselves to death. I have to take it one day at a time. Doctors claim they don’t know why children get cancer . They say it’s not hereditary …idk again one day at a time. I also believe the enemy is working on me now to try to tell me God is not real.
Oops meant above post A picture of 3 young beautiful boys etched into a stone….above post..all buried together
Heather I am worried because the ideations can turn into actions pretty quickly even if you don’t think that you really are capable of killing yourself. When I was suicidal (and still every once and a while), those thoughts kept coming… “You should die, this is pointless and hopeless and you’re worthless”, but I could remind myself that things would get better and keep the thoughts about suicide at bay kind of. I never told anyone or tried to get help. And then one day, I still don’t know why, I agreed with the thoughts and tried to kill myself. I think the best thing you can do is keep talking to people and don’t bottle it up and lose yourself in that type of thinking.
This would be a great time to get a counselor if you don’t have one. It really helps to have a non-judgmental person to talk to about everything. For you, a Christian counselor would probably be really helpful. And keep leaning on your friends and getting hold of people when you need to.
Jack I actually do see a doctor and a counselor. The counselor and I have 8 sessions left. I know she means well but it’s not helping . My doctor does indeed help me. But if I mentioned suicide Id be pink slipped in…it’s already happened and I don’t want to go back to the hospital . I do not feel it helped last time. They just doped me up and I wanted out.
Actually coming to this blog gives me great comfort …idk who you guys are but I feel i can let it out in a safe way. I want to walk to the cemetery give my husband a shot and say “wake up and come home with me.” But I assure you I know it’s not possible. I’m lonely and I’m going to join a support group. Maybe I will make some friends .I’m not delusional ..just hurting .
Already feeling better
I think a support group for young widows or for parents with ill children (or both) would be excellent for you Heather. You must feel very isolated and it might help to have people who understand who can grieve with you.
Yes Jack I agree. I used to drink but I was able to quit. My doc put me on some medication and it really helps. Sometimes a doctor and counselor have conflicting ideas. I feel medication ..if taken as directed is most helpful. My counselor believes that I should not take it. Id really be a mess if I didn’t so I disagree with her. TS my daughter was 5 when she was diagnosed .
Please don’t think I’m a sniveling cry baby. I just needed to talk. I know I’ve been blessed with good parents. I’ve had a pretty good life. I was looking forward to a good new year…last year was the Pitts. I know people out there have it much worse than me. And tragedy strikes everyone . Years of nursing …I’ve seen it all.
I don’t think you are a crybaby at all. You are nowhere as bad as I am lulz. You’ve had a really awful last couple of years, a lot of pain for one person to handle. :(
Its just that the world is me me me!! I will lend my ear to anyone but i know a woman whose biggest problem is making her car payment on time. I wish that was my biggest problem. And indeed i do have friends that care.
Heather, like you and Jack, I’ve felt suicidal before and still get twinges of it these days when I’m under an extra lot of stress. I really hope you have someone good to help counsel you right now.
I’m not trying to be presumptuous here, since I don’t really know you, but it seems like you might be a bit like my friend “Jo.” who had a horrible span of time a few years back, where she lost her mother and sibling in the course of a year, and felt completely shattered. Then she had a breast cancer scare.
She told me that on her trip to Turkey, she stood above the Bosporus and imagined what it would be like to slip into the water and disappear and not have to deal with it anymore. There was just so much pain at once. But she’s actually a really strong person most of the time, and she was just going through a terribly bad period. Things did get better, and she’s really happy now. (Don’t we all love a happy ending?)
Again, not trying to presume, but you strike me as someone who’s normally pretty strong and with it. As horrible as recent events have been, it’s likely to get better soon.
I don’t know if there’s any history of clinical depression in your family, but there is in mine. I’m on a fair bit of happy pills, but I still have those bad times. And what I want to say is don’t flirt too much with the idea of escape. There’s a realistic chance I may succumb to it one day (though I try hard not to, mainly for my daughter’s sake), but if chemistry’s not your situation, your odds will be pretty good in the long run. Just hold on for now!
(Hope that came out all right and not like a ’70s inspirational poster with a kitten clinging to a branch.)
Oy, so many comments while I was trying to figure out how not to sound like a jerk! Glad you’re getting some comfort from here, Heather, and I sincerely hope things get better soon.
Jack we may have more in common then you think . This is not the place to discuss it all. My husband got into some bad stuff the 3rd yr into our marriage . I was somewhat shocked when i received the cause of death. Well here goes accidental OD soboxin.
Roxy you came off just fine. A jerk? No way:)
OK, good!
Oops suboxone
Oh I’m so sorry Heather. They used methadone instead of suboxone to wean me off heroin, but both of those drugs are tricky and easy to overdose on. That’s really awful.
I’m really sorry about everything Heather. My family has had it rough for a few years, but at least it was spread out. I have an uncle who died of liver cancer in 2005 (he was 53), an aunt who died of colon cancer in 2007 (she was 49) and then my father died of a stroke in 2010 (he was 56). So, (I really can’t believe I’m actually going on about my issues in the middle of this, my apologies if that’s out of line) the thing is, although you’re going through a lot of horrible things at once I’m sure you’ll still find life worth living after all of it. We’re all here for you, please do not give up.
I’m sorry about your losses too JDC. I hope you are doing okay.
Anytime drugs are mentioned there IS a stigma. Husband had 2 back surgeries he was on Percocet for years..he was in his 50s so docs worried about his liver. He was put on suboxone and apparently underestimated the potency. He clinically died in front of me once and i was able to revive him with CPR…this time it wasn’t meant to be
Thank you jdc. So sorry and yes Jack my husband was a heroin addict…the subs were given to stop the cravings .
That’s the problem with opiates and opioids. They are really easy to underestimate and easy to OD on, even if you have used them for years. I half-ODed on heroin several times and seriously have no idea why I’m alive, and that was after a couple years of use and knowing my limits (plus heroin’s hard to guage how much you are using). I’m really upset that your husband fell victim to this.
And there is a stigma, people don’t understand addiction, they don’t understand chronic pain (mental or physical) and they like to judge. If anyone judges you or your husband I’ll fly to your state and punch them for you. Snotty busy-bodies who have never dealt with anything usually.
Knowing that others have felt the same way I do helps…suicidal thoughts drugs. Drugs are an epidemic where I live. I’m drifting back to a normal feeling. Calming down. Unfortunately I’ve known of at least 10 people who have died of drug overdoses in the last 2 years. My husband was in treatment and prison. The most important thing a good friend told me was “you can’t fix it.” I tried but I just could not fix it. He died fighting his demons.
No, you can’t fix it. You can be a support, you can be there for them, but ultimately the addict is the one that has to fight it. It honestly breaks my heart that he died while he was fighting so hard to stay clean (unlike what jerks like to say, opiate replacement like suboxone IS an attempt to get clean, not to keep using).
Almost every friend I have ever had died to drug overdoses, suicide, or murder. It’s part of the life. It’s a horrifying thing. But you probably gave him the best years of his life and you can hold onto that.
Thanks Jack. Yeah people are wagging their tongues of course. My brother in law is the worst. Hes in recovery himself and always called. my husband a loser because he kept slipping up. Oh boy did he cry at that wake. Felt guilty.
Former addicts can be the harshest. But seriously, people are freaking cruel, gossiping about your husband. Just tell them that you are soooo happy that they are perfect and have never struggled with anything ever. I can’t stand people like that.
I am praying for you and your daughter. Heather.
Thank you CT…as I say Jack its always funny or easy to judge when its not your pain. A friend of my husband stopped by to see how I was doing He went on to say your husband just couldn’t stop talking about you. He really loved you. Laughed about how funny you are and Greg said ..he really loved you. That made me happy.
Well i will leave it at that..knowing he’s in a better place with his mom dad brother and son..who was killed in a car accident. I don’t think I will give up. I’m gonna try to stay positive …thanks for all of the support from EVERYONE !!
I hope we helped at all. Don’t give up, everyone is rooting for you and you can do it.
Sorry for the troubles you’re going through, Heather. Sent up prayers. God bless.
Thanks everyone ..Jack wishing you well with your addiction. I didn’t mean to make it all about me and my problems. I do know people who are staying clean. Its a battle . Crack is also a big one but heroin is more popular here. Either way I know people slip and beat themselves up. I’ve applied for survivors benefits and I am hoping they come. Its a struggle. I could use the money . Don’t beat yourself up.
Ty mother in Texas…my husband left behind our soon to be 3 yo son. He was a worker and now although I hate to talk money I could use it. I’m maintaining but I’m in a financial struggle . Please pray that help will come soon.
Just because something occurs across cultures, nature, and history doesn’t mean it’s natural.
Many problems have crossed cultures, nature, and history that would not exist if we lived in a perfect world, and if our bodies operated perfectly, and according to what the design is.
Biologically, humans are designed to sexually complement each other as obvious in the fact that we aren’t all one sex or the other, there’s TWO sexes. It’s impossible to do that in a homosexual relationship. Look at the way males and females fit together…look it what IN GENERAL result is–bonding, babies, the building up of families and society. Like I said, we live in a IMperfect world. People make mistakes…bodies make mistakes…genetics can have anomalies.
There are things that humans are naturally geared toward based on our biological designs and reproductive designs. IF we were meant to go either way, wouldn’t it make sense that the POSSIBILITY of a conception of a child in a homosexual relationship would result…yet that has NOT happened. Two people born male who have sexual experiences with each other can’t conceive a child, likewise, two people born female who have sexual experiences with each other can’t conceive, either. There’s NO possibility AT ALL for them to procreate. So it’s NOT possible to have a true marriage since marriage has two main aspects in the sexual embrace (sexual intercourse): unitative (bonding), and procreative (having the POSSIBILITY of children).
Agree mother in Texas …well going to bed. Keep. hoping my husband will come to see me in a dream..hasn’t happened yet.
” There are things that humans are naturally geared toward based on our biological designs and reproductive designs. IF we were meant to go either way, wouldn’t it make sense that the POSSIBILITY of a conception of a child in a homosexual relationship would result…yet that has NOT happened. Two people born male who have sexual experiences with each other can’t conceive a child, likewise, two people born female who have sexual experiences with each other can’t conceive, either. There’s NO possibility AT ALL for them to procreate. So it’s NOT possible to have a true marriage since marriage has two main aspects in the sexual embrace (sexual intercourse): unitative (bonding), and procreative (having the POSSIBILITY of children).”
Disregarding the fact that homosexual behavior can possibly play an evolutionary purpose (I read a pretty fascinating paper that hypothesized that homosexuality is more common among younger sons and in more populated areas is to reduce sexual competition, it was just a hypothesis but made sense). Your idea about humans being “meant to go either way” doesn’t make sense. No one claims that. The vast majority of people are heterosexual. Some people have some homosexual leanings and a small minority have a homosexual orientation. No one claims that homosexuality is as common as heterosexuality.
You are, like most opponents of marriage equality, equating religious (Catholic it seems?) definitions of marriage with the legal definition of marriage. According to your religious beliefs that is what marriage is, but legally that isn’t what it is.
No problem Heather thank you for the good wishes. I will be fine.
“I’m sorry about your losses too JDC. I hope you are doing okay.”
Thanks, and yes I’m ok for the most part. Thins have gotten difficult recently because a likely cancerous blockage was found during a colonoscopy on my grandpa. They’re going to have to operate on that soon, and obviously I’m concerned. He’s 88, so at least one way or another he’s going to have lived a long life. Interestingly enough, I saw him tonight and he actually seems pretty normal. Well, now I’m starting to ramble, so I’d better just go to bed. Good Night, everyone.
JackBorsch,
Focus on the biological side of my argument. It’s 1:12 a.m. in the morning, which is not exactly the best hour for me to try and debate a point (which is a good lesson for me to remember: Mother In Texas, do NOT comment on Jill Stanek’s blog after 9 p.m.–brain slows down!)
P.S. Click here (This guy does a better job at presenting the points than I do): http://marysaggies.blogspot.com/2012/05/why-same-sex-marriage-is-bad-idea.html?spref=tw (Yes, he’s Catholic, but he presents the non-religious points as well, so before you write him off as a religious, hear him out).
Jack, what about marriage equality for communes. They should be able to all be legally married to one another cause they all love each other and they are completely open to sex with each other and they share everything with one another. Does that mean they would all be able to file taxes as head of Household or could Joe claim Jack’s kids as dependents even though they are Shirley’s kid and she lives in the commune too?
Good night JDC, I’m sorry about your grandad’s health. Keep us posted?
And good night MiT I’ll try to read your link tomorrow, my eyes are all tired and every thing is blurring.
truth I can’t think right now but I will say I don’t really have a problem with legal arrangements for custody and thinks like that in cases where thaere is more than one person raising a child. This is part of reason I think the language of marriage should not be used legally.
I will just say this…i am against gay marriage . Some people agree some don’t. I stick to scripture on that one. I know 2 gay men who have been together for 28 years. One of them is HIV positive . They have absolutely no interest in getting married nor do they support it. I also knew a lesbian couple and they had kids. They were pro life. They also expressed o interest in marriage .
Perverting the definition of marriage to include two people of the same gender and pre-natal homicide are bastard children of the same father/mother [el diablo/la diabla, aka lord of the flies/dung goddess.]
the ‘father of lies’ is the primary common denominator.
“You are of your father, the devil, and it is your will to practice the lusts and gratify the desires [which are characteristic] of your father. He was a murderer from the beginning and does not stand in the truth, because there is no truth in him. When he speaks a falsehood, he speaks what is natural to him, for he is a liar [himself] and the father of lies and of all that is false.” John 8:44
I also believe the enemy is working on me now to try to tell me God is not real.
I believe this too, Heather, and have felt this exact way at my lowest points. Christ promises to help you defeat satan. Keep talking with Him. Are you the one I’m thinking of who had one Catholic parent? If so, maybe you know a bit about the Rosary? I personally am a strong advocate of the Rosary and you can find the Rosary said out loud on the internet. After some time, these prayers can help you meditate and ease your mind from spinning off during very difficult times.
When you talked of your husband, I wondered what happened because he was still young but I never asked. I thought maybe it had something to do with drugs/alcohol but didn’t want to push the subject in case you didn’t want to talk about it. I am so sorry.
I had a fifty-year-old drug addict/alcoholic friend who passed last week (she fell). I partied with her when we were younger and did daycare for her children later on. Two of four are still teenagers. I am heartbroken and couldn’t get myself to go to her funeral. Like you, I avoid cemeteries (I didn’t go to my Grandpa’s burial nor visit his grave for ten years). My goal today is to write letters to her parents, husband, sisters, and children.
Patients are so lucky to have such a compassionate nurse as yourself. I wish more people like you got into nursing; you are needed. Praying that you are able to find some peace this week.
As far as the first cartoon goes, I think of the old saying, “Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me.”
Hopefully our nation will not be fooled twice.
“Disregarding the fact that homosexual behavior can possibly play an evolutionary purpose”…
I believe you meant to write the ‘possibility homosexual behavior’ because I do not know of any evolutionist or geneticist who has asserted it is a ‘fact’ that homosexuality is the result of evolution/natural selection.
If homosexuality were a product of evolution/natuarl selection then in just a few generations the gene(s) for homosexuality would be eliminated from the gene pool.
I suppose overpopulation could be an environmental cause for homosexuality.
We observe attempts at homosexuality in overpopulated non-human species as well as cannibalism, but natural selection/evolution/Gaia always provides a method to bring things back into balance.
Maybe that explians the wacko runing the show in North Korea.
You don’t really understand genetics very much do you Ken?
And I don’t assert it as a “fact” that homosexuality can arise from genetics, that’s why I said “possibly”. Most experts do agree that the evidence points to a biological cause though.
“Good night JDC, I’m sorry about your grandad’s health. Keep us posted?”
Thanks Jack, and yes I will.
“I had a fifty-year-old drug addict/alcoholic friend who passed last week (she fell).”
I am so sorry for your loss Praxedes. Wow, it seems everyone has had a rough time lately.
Wow I missed that I am sorry for the loss of your friend too Praxedes.
Ken, Do you believe that there is a biological cause for drug addictions? I have heard experts claim this, too.
That’s why I choose not to have that first hit.
I guess I’ve heard ‘experts’ claim to know a lot of things, though. Maybe becoming a drug addict is actually a choice. Or it could be based on being exposed to drug use as a child or manipulated into using drugs by adults. The child sees the behavior as normal and acceptable. I’ve seen drug addictions run in dysfunctional, abusive families so I don’t know whether it is biological or just the way one is raised. Probably a combination of the two.
I still believe we play the main role in whether we become a drug addict or not, though. Whether addictions are nature or nurture, I make the final decisions on how I behave as an adult. I decide how I raise my children, and what I allow them to be exposed to.
I don’t think our government should legalize heroin just because some people choose to become addicted to it though. Please don’t think that because I disagree with legalizing heroin, that I don’t love those who struggle with addictions. I do. Very much so.
Thanks, Jack. She was a beautiful woman who will be greatly missed.
Thanks, JDC. We had a lot of fun times together. I can’t imagine what her family is going through right now. So far, I am avoiding writing my letters. I can’t believe that she is gone. ):
There is a lot of evidence that addiction is genetic in many cases, but I do agree that generally the addict makes the choice of whether to start on that path or not.
I do wonder why a lot of people don’t understand that a lot of people start using before they are even old enough to have a realistic chance of understanding what they are getting into. We as a society understand an 11 or 12 or 13 year old isn’t old enough to consent to sex, not old enough to consent to a contract, or be held legally responsible for crimes to the same extent that an adult is. But when it comes to drugs people seem to think that the same kid, that they would call a rape victim if someone had sex with them, is completely capable of understanding why drugs are harmful and why you should abstain. Even worse, they expect it out of kids who have literally no guidance on addictive substances or even had it pushed on them by their stupid drunk dad because he thought it was funny to get a kid tipsy, or by older teens who think it’s fun (and probably started at the same age and received the same lack of guidance). It just seems.. unfair. And harsh.
That’s not directed at anyone, it’s just something that bugs me a lot.
My friend also had two siblings and three sibling-in-laws who died directly due to addictions at young ages. There is some confirmed and much suspected abuse in these two families. Two of those five siblings also had AIDS. The living siblings have dealt with many destructive issues themselves. As have her parents and children.
I agree with Jack that children are not completely capable of understanding why some behaviors are destructive. If they do not have the correct guidance, they may grow up thinking destructive, deviant behaviors are normal.
Nature vs. nurture. Or a combination of both.
See that family you describe is kind of how my dad’s side of the family is. Lots of addiction, lots of suicide, lots of mental illness, lots of all types of abuse in every generation. It seems fairly likely to me there is a combination of genetic and nurturing issues on that side (don’t know anything about my mom’s but she obviously has some type of mental illness and those don’t usually just appear out of thin air). I don’t know if you can completely break the cycle if there’s “nature” problems no matter how much nurture you have, and that’s part of the reason I wasn’t excited about having biological children. But we’ll see, my kids seem smart and happy so far but they are just little.
And unlike my dad I’m not planning on passing on all the hellish issues that are completely possible to avoid doing, like abusive actions.
To Heather, let me say first I am so sorry for your loss of your husband and the recent diagnosis of cancer of your daughter. You are in my prayers for you and your family. Others of you who are struggling with family illness, loss, addiction issues, etc, I am truly sorry for your situations and will pray for you as well. There are many great compassionate people who blog here, some people of faith some are not but it is great to read of so many caring people. Heather, Jesus said he came to “heal the broken hearted, bind up the wounded, and to set the captives free”.
I know some here think that redefining marriage is a compassionate, fair thing to do. I disagree with you and pray that your eyes will be opened but maybe no amount of discussion will change your mind especially when you have family and friends involved in homosexual relationships because you love them (which you definitely should). I have talked to counselors, social workers, ministers, therapists, physicians but most importantly I have talked to ex-homosexuals (they use this label for themselves). All say there probably are a variety of social, emotional, familial, psychological and spiritual factors involved but noted almost all people involved with same-sex relationships have been involved with sexual, physical, emotional abuse situations as children or teens (heterosexual abuse by family or friends was very common), some were groomed into homosexual relationships by family or adults who took them “under their wing” to take advantage of their abandonment, loneliness or fatherless issues. Note I said “almost all” not “all”. I worked with a young lady who had severe self-esteem abandonment issues and was searching for love and acceptance who admitted that since she had been hurt by men she went into lesbian relationships because she thought “it wouldn’t hurt as much” to be involved with a woman. She told me pointblank ”it was a LIE’, it hurt probably more because I knew in my heart it was wrong, I had no peace, so I acted out sexually even more, began cutting, sleeping around, becoming more and more decadent.” Another lady related “I was groomed by an adult woman as a underaged teen, I was a foster child, that was given away by my family, I wanted to be loved and acccepted more than anything else so this woman befriended me, bought me stuff, took time with me but she also took my innocence, my body and my heart. I had no peace. I began to act, dress and look like a man thinking it would make me tough like a man. I still had no peace. Homosexuality is not genetic, it is not a civil right, it is a sexual behavior, it is transformable. When I gave my heart to Christ He tranformed me to be the woman He created me to be. I now have joy and peace.”
For those who care the following links deal with consequences of homosexuality:
http://www.MassResistance.org The article”What same-sex “marriage” has done to Massachusetts:It’s far worse than most people realize. To download the article go the right upper part of the Home Webpage. Deals with consquences to public schools, public health, hospitals, domestic violence, business and employment, legal profession, adoption, birth certificates, government mandates and CHURCHES being harrassed.
If you’re in a male same-sex marriage, it is 50 percent more likely to end in divorce than a heterosexual marriage. If you’r in a female same-sex marriage, this figure soars to 167%. (Source Gunnar Anderson, “Divorce-Risk Patterns in Same-Sex Marriages in Norway and Sweden” Institute for Marriage and Public Policy,2004)
Lots of CDC articles, FDA article why MSM are asked to self-defer giving blood, (since 1977 have a HIV prevalence 60 times higher than the general population, 800 times higher than 1st time blood donors and 8000 times higher than repeat blood donors including higher risk of other infections Hepatitis B, Hepatitis C, Herpes), articles on WSW high risk of STDs; bacterial vaginosis, chlamydia and HIV (many have sex with high risk men or are IVD users or have sex with men who do-one study found 81% reported sex with men in the past 3 years…hmmm why?)
An article by Robert Oscar Lopez raised by a lesbian in the gay community who opposes “gay marriage” “not because of hate for gay people but because the machine that is turning people into chattel must be stopped” meaning CHILDREN. Marriage is not about who adults choose to love but about protecting children. He explains “the fight for marriage has never been about marriage…”
http://www.americanthinker.com/2013/01/the_oncoming_human_rights_crisiscaused_by_the_lgbt_movement.html
“almost all people involved with same-sex relationships have been involved with sexual, physical, emotional abuse situations as children or teens (heterosexual abuse by family or friends was very common), some were groomed into homosexual relationships by family or adults who took them “under their wing” to take advantage of their abandonment, loneliness or fatherless issues. Note I said “almost all” not “all”.”
Do you have any statistics to support this? If you’re claiming that homosexuality is caused and influenced by abuse it should be easy to come by reliable evidence.
I actually revised my position that I used to hold, I do think sexual abuse in particular can influence straight people to “experiment” with the same sex and be afraid of or otherwise not involve themselves exclusively with the opposite sex. I was pretending that didn’t ever happen for personal reasons. But I don’t think it can change someone’s basic orientation and I haven’t seen the evidence that it can.
“FDA article why MSM are asked to self-defer giving blood, (since 1977 have a HIV prevalence 60 times higher than the general population, 800 times higher than 1st time blood donors and 8000 times higher than repeat blood donors including higher risk of other infections Hepatitis B, Hepatitis C, Herpes),”
Yeah, because certain sex acts have a higher risk of STDs. It’s not a secret and never has been. Lesbians who never have sex with men have lower rates of certain STDs than straight women because certain acts don’t carry high disease risk. I don’t know where you are getting your HIV numbers, because lesbians are a lower risk for that if they don’t have sex with men and don’t use IV drugs.
I think the blood bank is a weird way of looking at whether something is wrong. You can’t give blood if you lived or visited certain countries but it doesn’t make travel there immoral or wrong.
Sounds like they’re getting them from homosexual MEN, who end up with a higher risk of contracting the disease due to blood contact from minute anal tearing during unprotected sex.
Great post and thanks for the prayers, Prolifer L. I still have not started my letters.
Today I’m feeling guilty that I should have tried more to help her. Over the years, my husband and I had grown away from her and her family because of their destructive choices. The last time my soft-spoken husband saw her, he got into a loud argument with her and told her what her behavior was doing to everyone around her.
No evidence of the damage that drugs do was enough to save my friend.
No evidence of the damage abortion does will be enough to change the minds of some people, either.
Maybe we need evidence of what gay ‘marriage’ will do to our country, too. We Americans are an arrogant lot.
Praxedes I don’t know the details but I doubt anything you could have done would have helped. Some people can’t overcome the demons and you can’t let yourself get hurt by them in the process. I don’t think you are at fault and I bet she knew you cared.
Thank you pl L and all. Id like to start off with the homosexuality issue. Please know that I do not hate gays or lesbians at all. One very close friend of mine was a gay male and eventually his partner loved me to death. The partner had an identical twin brother who was straight. I asked Joe do you think you were born gay or do you think it was a choice ? He explained I believe I was born this way. I haven’t the answers ..both were very bad alcoholics and they would beat the devil o
Out of one another . They used to get on the computer to as they put it ” look for some strange ” They lived right by our local airport so men would stop by their home and engage in sex and get their flights home. Many of these men were married to women . Well Joe became very ill one week but brushed of seeing a doctor . He eventually ended up in the ER..his lover is a nurse and he figured he would be leaving with a prescription . The staff explained no sir you are going to ICU..you are very sick.
Well after a week in ICU and another on a step down unit the HIV was discovered. The specialist suspected it all along with him being gay and admitting to unsafe sex with multiple partners. The health department wanted to notify their partners and Joe said “Idk who they are.”
So now whoever Joe had sex with…different states and countries have no idea they could be infected. The straight men can infect their wives and Joe has no idea who infected him
Feel same and heard same about addiction some say its a weak minded individual making a choice ..people in AA say its a disease . My husband was a drinker but began snorting heroin after a good frienemy told him hey man this will make you feel great. At 52 he was using a needle
My husband overdosed once at the dope house and 911 saved him. 36 hours out of treatment he overdosed again and was clinically dead in front of me. I revived him with CPR. 911 came and administered Narcan. He was hospitalized. He went to prison and was released on Feb 13Th. I came home from work Feb28Th and found him dead on the floor. Cold stiff and blue.
My husband had a heart of gold. He cried if he was hurt. Sometimes I believe he was grieving himself to death over his son…killed in 2004 car accident. The man I loved so much blew through a 75 thousand dollar workmans comp settlement. Lost his beautiful Cadillac crashed his beautiful envoy into a telephone pole and ended up on SSI . The man I married was not the man I buried however he cried and apologized endlessly for what he’d put me through. When I found him I stroked his hair kissed him and said go be with God baby. Your suffering is over. I then called 911 and waited for the coroner .
I miss him…God do I miss him. I’m so very sorry for anyone else who has shared a loss today. PliferL…how terrible !!! I can’t make sense of anything anymore . I try. God bless everyone for your kindness and input. I know this sounds selfish but I keep wanting my husband to come and visit me in a dream. It sounds crazy but I called his cell phone which is sitting on my table and I left a message. Brad come and see me.
I need closure. I think if he came to tell me he was okay i could let go.
That doesn’t sound crazy or selfish Heather it sounds very painful.
Heather, do you have any one that can come and stay over with you?
Just having someone stay bedside with you until you can fall asleep is sometimes a great help. I bet you have always been the one to do that with others though. When I first was divorced and the kids were not home, I was not used to being alone. I would sleep with the crucifix under my pillow.
If no one can come over, please know that I am with you in heart and spirit. Put a chair next to your bed and picture me there. (I am a chubby, middle-aged woman with long scraggly dishwater blonde hair and blue eyes. I will pray with you).
My Grandpa came to my mom after he passed away and I hope and pray that your husband comes to you in your dreams if it will help bring a bit of relief.
Gosh darnit, I wish people would stop selling drugs.
Thanks Jack it is. I’m glad his suffering is over but mine is now beginning . I had an okay day today. Putting things in perspective a little more but people warned me sometimes it just comes crashing back like a knife to the heart. Yesterday was indeed one of those days.
Thanks Prax…I’ve had friends stay. They were worried . I enjoyed their company but I also enjoy my alone time. I’ve been a nurse for 26 years and I’ve heard many stories of loved ones who came to visit…especially when I worked is hospice. I don’t fear death at all and I talk on the phone a lot. what did your grandfather say?
My heart goes out to whoever posted about the alcoholic woman who fell and died. And jdc that’s a lot of losses. I wish drugs weren’t so appealing either. I know Brad used them so he wouldn’t have to feel mental and physical pain…and to prax I will picture your picture :)
From what I remember, Grandpa just smiled and reassured Mom that everything was okay but I’ll have to ask her to find out if there was anything more specific that he said.
Prax..that would be good enough for me. I’ve heard several stories but my ex told me about a visit from his father beyond the grave….he exclaimed. Heather I wasn’t dreaming . He came and sat on Teds bed and told him he was in a beautiful place and okay ….more to it but he knew his dad visited then simply said I have to go.
Jack in this PC environment you are kidding right? Who from the APA would give any statistics of the percentages of homosexuals who have been sexually, physically, or emotionally abused? This is an organization who touts as one of their crowning achievements that homosexuality should be celebrated, is no longer a disorder that should be treated even for those have “unwanted” same-sex attraction and if you don’t agree with this they will blacklist you and get you kicked out of psychiatry or psychology practice if possible. That would be double jeopardy for them because they don’t want anyone to make the connection. Recent case in Michigan of a young AA woman who was kicked out of a psychology graduate program for not endorsing a lesbian relationship (due to her faith), I understand they did reinstate her later after they were under duress. The extensive compilation of research by Dr. Charles Diggs MD on “The Health Risk of Gay Sex” has been blasted by the gay activists as a bunch of homophobic, bigoted garbage although he sited over 8 pages of research from sound reliable researchers (he documented physical, emotional, psychological and mental health risks for homosexuals and lesbians).
How do you get stats for WSW only when 81% are having sex with men over a 3 year period? Pretty difficult, but that makes an interesting question why if it is a “natural” alternative lifestyle? A comprehensive study “Chlamydia trachomatis infections among women screened in Family Planning Clinics in the Pacific Northwest, 1997 to 2005” analyzing 9358 clinic visits tracked women for 1 year Chlamydia positivity among both WSW or WSMW (bi) was 7.1% compared with 5.3 among WSM (hetero) exclusively. I hope the link will work at http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/20724697
If WSM were more likely to have STDs shouldn’t this have shown up with this large of a sample (if your theory was correct I would have expected to see at least double the percentage of STDs with women having sex with men exclusively)? For those who think alternative lifestyles are just great it won’t make a difference. Which is their perogative. It is still a free country last time I checked. Good night.
God bless you Heather and others who are suffering right now. I will be praying for you.
It almost seems trivial after reading these personal accounts of suffering and loss but I have to go back to the homo/abortion connection.
Kari and Jack believe that somehow the pro-life movement is standing in the way of homosexual rights. I really do not see it. To me it is a complete and unadulterated red herring. Show me the mission statement of any pro-life organization which has an anti-homosexual agenda in it.
I have been in the pro-life movement for decades and never, not once, never did I attend a meeting where anti-homo sentiment was mentioned as part of the cause. And as far as the alleged anti-homo bias on the the part of prolifers preventing a stampede of homosexuals to join our cause—sorry, I just don’t see it. Furthermore according to most polling data the actual population of homosexuals is in the low single digits, so please explain how even if we were anti-gay zealots exactly how many thousands of gays might otherwise be solid prolifers but for the alleged anti-gay sentiments of prolifers.
Again, the only connection here is the obvious comparison of a potential judicial overreach on the part of SCOTUS, the same as they did with abortion. End of story! Saying that or something similar does not in and of itself make me or any other prolifer or commentator to be anti-homosexual.
Having said that though, think about it, who comprises a very large percentage of the prolife movement? Yes, a very substantial component of the prolife movement are people with lots of kids. The obvious fact here is that they are heterosexual, so maybe what some more extreme homosexual elements have dreamed up is a guilt by association scenario wherein if you are heterosexual you are surely anti-homosexual.
Prolifer L-
1. The APA doesn’t think that “unwanted same-sex” attraction shouldn’t be treated or dealt with. They think that reparative therapy is damaging and ineffective the way that it’s touted by “ex-gay” organizations. My therapist works with sexual abuse victims primarily, some of what he does is help people who are struggling with their sexual identity either due to abuse or whatever other issues. He still thinks reparative therapy is completely wrong, even though he knows some people who aren’t gay sometimes struggle with same-sex attraction or acting out with the same sex, especially with the type of clients he works with. I still think that if gay people were abused as children at much higher rates than straight people that someone would have reliable stats on it. You don’t have trouble finding stats on STDs among gay men, even though it’s not flattering and easy to misinterpret.
And do people realize what the claim that gays are abused at much higher rates than straight people says about the sexuality of people who were abused? It’s a pretty hefty assumption to make about people.
Everything is biased if you don’t already agree, I’m as guilty as that as anyone. I don’t know why that woman in Michigan was kicked out, did they have concerns that she wouldn’t serve LGBT patients in an neutral way?
2. Purely looking at sexual health and STDs, some sex acts are riskier than others. Some sex acts are practiced more often by gay people than straights, but few sex acts are exclusive to gay people. That’s why the whole “omg gay people have more STDs” thing falls flat. It’s not something inherent to being gay, it’s the type of sex. Straight people who indulge in certain acts are at higher risk than other straight people who don’t. Gay people who don’t indulge in certain acts are at lower risk. Also, the “dating pool” for a lack of a better term is much smaller for gays than it is for straight people, which means the consequences of promiscuity are higher. This article explains it pretty well: http://std.about.com/od/glbtcommunity/a/Why-Do-Gay-Men-Have-An-Increased-Risk-Of-Hiv.htm.
3. Don’t know about emotional/psychological problems. I would like to see them compared to the general population. I do have a suspicion that a lot of these issues have to do with being stigmatized and treated poorly.
” Kari and Jack believe that somehow the pro-life movement is standing in the way of homosexual rights. I really do not see it. To me it is a complete and unadulterated red herring. Show me the mission statement of any pro-life organization which has an anti-homosexual agenda in it.”
Did we say that or did you misinterpret what we said? I don’t think that pro-life organizations are “standing in the way of gay rights”. I do think that pro-life organizations tend to be exclusionary toward LGBT people, and the people who support them.
” I have been in the pro-life movement for decades and never, not once, never did I attend a meeting where anti-homo sentiment was mentioned as part of the cause. And as far as the alleged anti-homo bias on the the part of prolifers preventing a stampede of homosexuals to join our cause—sorry, I just don’t see it. Furthermore according to most polling data the actual population of homosexuals is in the low single digits, so please explain how even if we were anti-gay zealots exactly how many thousands of gays might otherwise be solid prolifers but for the alleged anti-gay sentiments of prolifers. ”
Oh don’t give me that Jerry, I see your comments, everyone’s comments here. I’ve been at pro-life organizations and events myself and I see the bias pretty easily. Don’t be dishonest and claim that pro-life organizations generally throw their arms out and welcome those of different lifestyles. Pro-life organizations tend heavily religious and heavily conservative. It’s just factual. You all make your displeasure with the “lifestyles” very clear. And it’s not invalid, your opinions are just as valid as anyone else’s, but I do think it’s damaging. Not just because it’s keeping just gay people away (who are a small percentage of the population, that’s true), but it keeps people who are pro-gay rights out. Which, in case you haven’t noticed, a huge chunk of the US is pro-gay rights. Those are a lot of possible allies for pro-life that we could make a dent in if we could make the pro-life movement more accepting.
” Having said that though, think about it, who comprises a very large percentage of the prolife movement? Yes, a very substantial component of the prolife movement are people with lots of kids. The obvious fact here is that they are heterosexual, so maybe what some more extreme homosexual elements have dreamed up is a guilt by association scenario wherein if you are heterosexual you are surely anti-homosexual. ”
That’s silly because most people are heterosexual and most people have children. And about half of people are pro-gay rights, which obviously includes a heckuva lot of heterosexuals and people with families. Gay people don’t think all heteros hate them. People who are pro-gay rights, however, do see the pro-life movement as exclusionary and I see that as a problem.
I know gay and lesbian pro lifers. A lesbian couple I know each brought a child into their relationship …obviously they were both with men before . The one told me. Heather I like what. you do…my abortion clinic work….she said If you’re gonna lay down and make a baby you need to lay down and have that baby!
However i still stick with scripture…I believe you love that person but I am against the lifestyle
My mom has a friend in Florida with one daughter. Her daughter Janet is a lesbian. Liz told me I love my daughter but I will never agree with her lifestyle. Janet and Kathy have been together for at least 35 years but Liz said Janet went back to church and has had a change of heart. She’s choosing abstinence over her gay lifestyle .
I took the liberal position and asked Liz…Why not just accept Janet and her lifestyle ? Oops wrong thing to say. She came out of that bedroom and yelled ” I will NOT ever accept it. I love my daughter and she knows the word!!” Janet looks like Chaz Bono..the male of the relationship if you will. She is large and very butch. I mean no disrespect. But Janet is now in her mid 50s and has since asked her girlfriend to leave. They remain friends but they are no longer a couple. Janet has chosen church and she is rejecting her gay lifestyle .
I have been in the pro-life movement for decades and never, not once, never did I attend a meeting where anti-homo sentiment was mentioned as part of the cause. And as far as the alleged anti-homo bias on the the part of prolifers preventing a stampede of homosexuals to join our cause—sorry, I just don’t see it.
Bravo!
Whether you are gay, straight, bi, prostitute, porn addict, drug addicted, alcoholic, black, white, green, pink, disabled in some way, shape or form, educated, a high school drop-out, male, female, unemployed, underemployed, workaholic, company president, in jail, drama queen, prom king, etc., etc. YOU ARE WELCOMED WITH OPEN ARMS IN THE PROLIFE MOVEMENT!! Let me say it again, ALL ARE WELCOME!
If you choose not to stand up for the lives of the youngest among us, it’s on you and you alone. Please quit blaming and making excuses for yourself and others.
Prax amen!
Jack says:
Oh don’t give me that Jerry, I see your comments, everyone’s comments here.
Ok, I’m listening. What were these comments?
Jack says:
Pro-life organizations tend heavily religious and heavily conservative. It’s just factual. You all make your displeasure with the “lifestyles” very clear.
You just laid out a guilt by association scenario that prolifers are intolerant of gays because of our mainstream views of marriage and family. If this is the standard used to judge anti-gay bias then every organization that professes adherence to a common set of values must be seen in the negative as intolerant of anyone not in the group. And yet the prolife movement represents in their membership every conceivable religious persuasion (including many atheists) age, race, and yes, even women. It seems that by their nature they are anything but exclusionary.
People who are pro-gay rights, however, do see the pro-life movement as exclusionary and I see that as a problem.
I take it by this that you think that it is the fault of the prolifers that the pro-gay rights people see us as exclusionary, that we have not done enough to reach out to them. Might it have occured to you that maybe the pro-gay rights people are reacting to the main stream media portrayal of prolifers as bigots and that is the real problem here? Why be so quick to assert that it is the prolifers fault?
Show me a single scholarly thesis done by a person of reputable academic achievement that shows a widespread, or even a hidden anti-gay consensus in the prolife movement. There is no such thesis because it simply is not true.
”There’s NO possibility AT ALL for them to procreate. So it’s NOT possible to have a true marriage since marriage has two main aspects in the sexual embrace (sexual intercourse): unitative (bonding), and procreative (having the POSSIBILITY of children).”
yes, because that’s why we don’t allow infertile, or old people to get married. ;p