Actor Jason Patric donates sperm, seeks legal rights to son
No child should have to endure a painful separation from a parent who loves that child because the other parent is no longer willing to share the child and asserts a legal technicality….
I just pray and I try to do everything I can legally, legislatively to have justice come.
~ Actor Jason Patric of The Lost Boys and Sleepers fame, commenting on his battle to have legal parental rights to his son, Gus (pictured above with his parents), who was conceived when Patric donated his sperm to former girlfriend Danielle Schreiber, as quoted by People, July 15
According to the article:
In February, a judge ruled Patric was simply a donor and, because the couple are not together, he couldn’t sue for custody….
In August, the California state assembly is expected to vote on the bill – which would allow courts to grant parental rights to sperm donors under broader conditions, such as if a donor showed that he openly acknowledged the child as his own and received the child into his home.
More here.
[HT: Jill]
Jill Stanek is a nurse turned speaker, columnist and blogger, a national figure in the effort to protect both preborn and postborn innocent human life.
wow. really? he was in ‘the alamo.’
Uh, we have such a huge problem in this country with biological fathers not paying child support and not raising their children that I don’t think we should sever parental rights for a biological father who may or may not initially been a father to his child. Paternity in this country is already screwed up (unless she puts you on the birth certificate off the bat or you’re married, your rights are limited as a biological father), we need to get some standards here.
This case is different from sperm donors that sign contracts waving any claim to children they create, I can’t find any evidence that this guy waved his paternal rights or had any type of written contract stating he was simply a donor.
On further investigation it seems that he had signed the donor forms as “intended parent” (which is common for artificial insemination in fertility clinics for even married couples who need help conceiving). He was listed as the father on preschool applications. He has also paid daycare tuition payments and the kid has called him “Dada” in a video. I think that’s some evidence that he has attempted to be some type of parent towards the kid, much more so than a single letter before the child’s birth.
I really am not fond of the mom, to be honest. “I have the sole legal right to parent my child”… fathers really aren’t disposable, and children have two biological parents.
I do not agree with donating sperm – I think it is unethical and this case clearly brings that to light. Sperm donation puts the wants of the parents before the needs and/or wants of the child and has dreadful effects on the donating parents. I am glad that Mr. Patric is trying to reconnect with his child. He is reminding everyone how easily fathers are dismissed in our society and about the isolating experience of sperm donation. His efforts to be an involved father is a good example to men everywhere. Hopefully, the court and society will find a way to support him. I hope he can get the rights that he is seeking. He is not just fighting the law, but the whole cultural attitude towards parenting, family, and fathers. He has a big battle in front of him. This case shows how small or unprotected men have become and how easily crushed. Men have given up most, if not all, of their legal protections. Men are exposed to being legally crushed, but sadly, not too many men are aware of their exposure.
As the saying goes: “No good deed goes unpunished.”
Except in this case the good deed may not have been so good, save that it created a life.
Mr. Patric was used, and he now realizes that. In one sense he is lucky that he never married the mother of his child – they probably would have divorced and he would have been further up the creek!
I am going to say a prayer for his son and the family. (Despite all this use of technology they are still a family – no matter what any contract, if any exists, says. The biological contract supercedes all human-made law.)
It doesn’t make sense that he would back sperm donors having more rights, while also claiming that he didn’t donate his sperm. He needs to think about what he is saying.
After reading about this case can anyone honestly say that the legal system is not warped? It appears the legal system has lost touch with reality, and with common sense. Bio-parents are losing more and more rights all the time – and most bio-parents go unwittingly along with changing the laws to their own disadvantage. Then when bio-parents have an “A-ha” moment or need to exercise their legal rights they soon realize those legal rights are gone to their dismay. Bio-parents need to be more prudent. This touches on the way gay marriage will change the laws. Sure gay marriage doesn’t change your marriage rights now, but once the laws take affect they will change your rights so that the rights you thought you implicitly had are no more. Gay marriage will also change the rights of new marriages after the laws come into effect in ways that are not so obvious. With gay-marriage and all social issues we need to look into how these changes will affect the laws, your rights in the future, and the rights of others, namely children. It is not about being anti-gay marriage but about being pro-biological rights.
She thinks her child is a commodity. She paid for it, so she gets to own it.
African slaves used to be commodities, too.
I really am not fond of the mom, to be honest.“I have the sole legal right to parent my child”… fathers really aren’t disposable, and children have two biological parents.
Well said Jack. This is a Life issue too often ignored. Children with fathers in their lives have a greater chance of avoiding teen pregnancy. Reducing abortion won’t come through overturning Roe v Wade per se, it will come when girls are taught by fathers that they are special without sleeping with a boyfriend, and when boys are taught by fathers how to respect girls.
Any so-called Christian father who doesn’t spend time with his kids and any so-called Christian mother who denies the father parental involvement with kids are mockeries to God. Both create stumbling blocks to children.
Jesus said, “”If anyone causes one of these little ones–those who believe in me–to stumble, it would be better for them to have a large millstone hung around their neck and to be drowned in the depths of the sea.” — Matthew 18:6
Society needs to recognize the biological rights of children, - their right to be born, and their right to be with their biological parents.
Even if he “donated” sperm, the issue of sperm donation should be entirely irrelevant – this man is the father of the child and he got back together with bio-Mom for over a year after Gus was born. Even if the Court doesn’t like the idea of giving him rights just because he is Bio-Dad, the court should give him some custody rights just to make it safer for the child when the child spends time with him. This case should not end up being about the ethics of sperm donation, but about the specific rights of this child and his parents.
In this case – I am pro-Gus.
Sperm donors are supposed to be anonymous. If he had a relationship with the mother AND the child, he’s NOT just a sperm donor. If RAPISTS are allowed “rights” to the child they create, why shouldn’t JP have any? *My father got my mother pregnant, then had NO further contact with either of us, THAT’S a “sperm donor”.
Great point Pamela – people too often get hung up on the technical definitions of words rather than trying to understand the reality they are supposed to represent. To me, the Court is agreeing with the Mother’s whole sperm donation fiction (which probably has some technical truth to it) because of the political backlash from the sperm donation community the court could face if it decided in favour of Mr. Patric. There is “open” sperm donation which means the children would have the right to see their parents if they so chose. “Closed” sperm donation is when the donor remains anonymous. I know about this because I visited an IVF website. It is really educational to visit one of these websites. Most of IVF centers pay for the donation – which really makes calling it a donation misleading. The only thing that makes it a “donation” is that the donors are not getting adequately compensated for the value of the product that they deliver. Yet despite this some of these guys “earn” over $2,000/week donating sperm! I don’t think most of the recipients realize how easily it would be for them to be deceived and that their child could have countless unknown siblings. We live a strange world that is getting stranger by the minute. I doubt there is adequate regulations of these clinics, and even less oversight and enforcement.
I should add that the fact there is “open” donation does not compensate the kids of “closed” donation – they are still not protected and have no legal rights.
Here are some good sites about the bad effects of sperm donation:
http://cryokidconfessions.blogspot.ca/
http://www.anonymousfathersday.com/
http://www.thepublicdiscourse.com/2013/02/7571/
It’s sad to me how few rights fathers have. Perhaps it is due to the annoying and patently false view that women are the caring ones and men are the sexual ones. It seems that there has been a growing trend towards believing that women are the more capable and the more nurturing of the human species, and all men care about is getting their jollies and watching the game. When in reality, I know many men who are excellent fathers and love their children as deeply as their wives do. The trope that fathers are bumbling, if sometimes well-meaning, idiots is harming families.
I will say that the one place I’ve seen this start to be reversed is in birthing settings. It seems dads are getting more respect in the delivery room and prenatal visits. But maybe that’s only the case with husbands and that may only be the case when the woman indicates that the husband is her partner.
Either way, men need more legal rights to properly father their children. And as a society, we need to do a better job supporting men and encouraging them to be the great dads they can be. Pretty much all that is said on the subject is that dad’s can’t do it alone, mom has to step in and take care of the family.
When will people finally get a clue and realize that we have to stop manufacturing children? They are not customizable to our lives and our likes. This is the tragedy that comes when we separate sex from reproduction, and when we separate sex from marriage.
That’s why it’s wrong. I’m sorry for Mr. Patric and very sorry for his son. But there was no way a situation like this could end well.
“Sure gay marriage doesn’t change your marriage rights now, but once the laws take affect they will change your rights so that the rights you thought you implicitly had are no more.” – which ones? How?
“Gay marriage will also change the rights of new marriages after the laws come into effect in ways that are not so obvious.” – which ones? How?