Baby blues
by Bethany Kerr
[Source: Rick Kirkman and Jerry Scott]
Feb.05, 2008 4:22 pm |
Feminism |
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Jill Stanek is a nurse turned speaker, columnist and blogger, a national figure in the effort to protect both preborn and postborn innocent human life.
It is a great trade!
My sister and I would have gone down the wrong career paths if it wasn’t for us stopping to raise children. We are both so much happier now.
Sometimes it is worth it to slow life down to make sure you are truly doing what you really want to do.
I couldn’t agree more!! I left a teaching career and have been home for almost 8 years now. Will never regret being here for my babes!!
Ooo, snap!
This is a really cute comic!!! For some parents, it really is the right choice. I’m glad for them. For some, however, it might not be, and I’m glad if they can pursue their dreams. It’s still an awesome comic. *giggle*
A career is temporary. Motherhood is eternal.
All this butt-kicking and edumacation will happily cease the day I am blessed with children.
YES!! She’s back!!!
This is a very cute cartoon!
However as a feminist I still say that woman shouldn’t have to choose between these things, either.
I, like most of my evil buddies, I tried domesticity and lasted about three months. (My friend Beth lasted about a year.)
Thank God, Gaia, and whoever those Bushmen with the clicky language pray to that there is an option. Kids or no kids, the women I hang out with tend to be the types who would be crushed by a career as a homemaker. Hell, the majority are college-educated and white collar, and a few are richer than you-know-who. They can certainly afford it.
(At the end of Beth’s year at home, her 4, 5, 11, and 14-year-old boys sent her back to work ’cause she brought her “type-A” compulsive nature home with her. The boys and the hubby were either going to send her back to work or fashion a giant hamster wheel in the back yard. She was a ‘chopper pilot in the Gulf War, and sorting laundry was making her kind of wacky…)
Ooo, snap!
Posted by: Nathan Will Sheets at February 5, 2008 4:55 PM
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Why does that garner a “snap?”
i really enjoyed the few years I was able to stay home with the kids. I have Martha Stewart tendencies and perfected home made play dough among other things. At the same time, I really yearned for adult conversation and found myself writing editorials to public figures that I disagreed with. Too bad blogs weren’t around then! Or maybe it’s a good thing that they weren’t.
Gotta tell ya though, it really sucks when you have to support children with a minimal education. Undoubtedly why my children have opted for education before children.
PIP –
Who said choose between them? I sure as heck didn’t. I’m at home now, which is lucky that we choose that for right now considering all of Danny’s problems and now Catherine is having problems with speaking. There is no way I could have “done it all”. I could not have kept working and did right by my children (developmental issues and all….) However, that doesn’t mean I won’t have a career! Everything is open to me that isn’t open to the working Mom. I can go back to school. Which I am looking into. I went back and got certified in Dog Training and was also able to study and keep my certification in grooming. I would never have had the time to do all that and work too. I’m also considering going back to school to get a jounalism or english degree. My options are all open and I have the opportunity to explore what I want to do for the rest of my life. Taking a few years off to be there for your kids when they are young and not in shcool is really not that long of time.
All my sister ever wanted to be when she grew up was a high powered businesswomen working on wall street or owning her own consulting firm..etc… She studied hard in college. She graduated top in her class. She was on her way to fulfilling her dreams. She planned on going back to work as soon as she could after her kid was born. But her son was born 6 weeks early. The umbilical chord had gotten twisted and he wasn’t getting the nutrition he needed. She choose to go on long term disabiltiy leave (something her insurance allowed for a sick baby) and she never went back. Ya know what? She had no idea how miserable she was until she got to slow down. She even had another kid! when her youngest started kindergarten, she went back to school and got her RN. She is now working in a children’s hospital on the cardiac floor and has never been happier. She is going to be going back to school to get her masters so she can be a nurse practitioner.
I think this is why there are so many divorces. Woman are expected to do it all. But we can’t. Look at what is happening. There are more divorces filed in a year than marriage license applied for. Our kids are getting so obese that there are now programs in the schools to get kids to exercise. Parents are so tired from working, cleaning the house, laundry, taking care of the bills, caring for the kids, etc they have no time to live. People are miserable. How is this better for women? Not only are we overworked, now we are divorced with no help with the kids (except every other weekend and possibly one night a week). Talk about no life. You become a work horse with no rewards. Yes, you have a career – but unless that career can provide a house cleaner, butler and nanny what good does it do?
Having kids doesn’t mean your career is over. It just means you take a short break. The jobs will still be there when the kids are in school. Maybe not the same employer that you had, but there isn’t just one employer for your career, there are multiple.
Wow – did that get long winded. well, if I wasn’t long winded you would think something was wrong with me! ;-)
I don’t see why it has to be a trade off. Women can have both. They can have careers and still have alot of quality time with their children. Many companies offer great benefits for working moms.
Exactly valerie, workplaces should make accommodations to help out working mothers so they don’t have to choose between being good moms and fulfilling their life dreams.
Valerie,
Being a mother, whether married or not, requires being a work horse. In an ideal world, the jobs will sill be there after your time away from work. In the real world, employers consider how long you have been away from your field and how long it will take for you to get up to speed.
And it doesn’t sound like your sister has slowed down at all. Just changed career fields.
Where is your primary thread?
This next election will determine the path of abortion rights for the next 30-40 years. Isn’t anyone interested?
Exactly valerie, workplaces should make accommodations to help out working mothers so they don’t have to choose between being good moms and fulfilling their life dreams.
Posted by: prettyinpink at February 5, 2008 8:05 PM
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LOL. Good luck making that happen. This blog certainly isn’t about the empowerment of women.
Mothering is a career. Although, I am still waiting for my paycheck.
You don’t have to choose. You have to prioritize. Kids and work will inevitably compete since both demand your time and attention. In that case, who wins?
I could work and raise children because I work on my own terms, not the world’s. But women that have children and let daycare raise them have chosen their priority.
“This blog certainly isn’t about the empowerment of women.”
Sally, what do you find empowering about women being able to destroy unborn children?
Valerie,
I have three kids and my youngest in now in preschool. I quit my job when my oldest was 6 months old. It was hard when we were used to leaving on two incomes and going to one. There were many sacrafices that were made, but I wouldn’t change it for anything. You can’t have that time back, and they are little for such a short time.
I just decided to go back to school. I already have a degree and have chosen to go in an entirely different direction. Hence I am back in school and I am have a class with kids half my age. That is a whole other story!:) (Not all college educated people choose a career over staying at home. The trend is that more and more women are choosing to stay home while their chldren are little and are re-entering the work place once they start school.)
We do our homework together and it is really good mom time with them. We talk about my day and they ask me if I have alot of homework. They see that to accomplish something takes hard work. My kids think it’s cool that I am back in school.
So I would encourage you to think about going back to school if it is something that really interests you.
Sally, what do you find empowering about women being able to destroy unborn children?
Posted by: jasper at February 5, 2008 8:50 PM
……………………………………………
They get to say nix nine to your puny contribution to a pregnancy/potential human being.
Jasper, what do you find empowering about denying abortion?
Sally,
Abstaining from sex to avoid an unwanted pregnancy is very empowering.
How about women who raise their own kids and have their own home daycares? I worked with one and she seemed very happy.
This next election will determine the path of abortion rights for the next 30-40 years. Isn’t anyone interested?
Posted by: FetusFascist at February 5, 2008 8:25 PM
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Seriously.
Mike Huckabee, the only pro-lifer left in either field, is taking upsets in state after state in the South. This could leverage into a vice-presidential bid.
I thought you guys would be doing that weird “fetus dance” that I know you all do in the privacy of your homes when nobody’s lookin’…
She gave up everything for her baby,
“Now to live vicariously through him!”
How about women who raise their own kids and have their own home daycares? I worked with one and she seemed very happy.
This is very cool..but lots of liability I am sure. I would like to work in a daycare cause they have discounts and your kid can be there while you make money..AND can have interaction with other children. Seems like a great idea to me.
I love my trade….
Although, I can’t think of one thing I “gave up” that I really even give a crap about anymore.
My “friends”….the people who cried when I refused to have an abortion…or the ones who called me a whore behind my back..hmm such a sweet bunch they were. And then there were the ones who just faded away cause they didn’t know how to deal with something that wasn’t partying it up or ditching class. Man, I MISS THEM!
Here’s some other things I gave up: Having no direction in life, whining about crap that never even mattered, making drama out of nothing, allowing myself to be used and abused by people, making poor decisions and not really caring either way.
YEP…I gave up A LOT. Poor me. Now I have to change diapers and read bedtime stories..sheesh how terrible it is this “duty” of being a mother.
I SO wish I could go back to being that whiny drama queen. Pleaaaaase, take me back to that life lacking any responsibility whatsoever. I miss it so.
Okay. I’m done now. Hope you get the point lol.
Laura, aka FF:
“Fetus dance” ?????
You are truly one warped, twisted individual.
Now I see why the horse let you have it.
Smart horse !
Now I see why the horse let you have it.
Smart horse !
Posted by: Mike at February 6, 2008 12:04 AM
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What the hell are you talking about?
Elizabeth,
Way to go. Hang in there baby!
FF,
You didn’t get the memo about the horse? Yeah there’s a horse now.
Elizabeth,
You are a funny girl! So glad you are raising that sweet little lady and did not allow others to stand in your way! Diapers, bedtime stories, temper tantrums…I am right there with ya!
Two women suicide bombers who have killed nearly 80 people in Baghdad were Down Syndrome victims exploited by al Qaida….
Wow, that pretty much says it all, no?
You didn’t get the memo about the horse? Yeah there’s a horse now.
Why would Laura need a memo, Jess? Laura is the one who first made the claim that she was kicked by a horse.
Bobby,
I responded to your comment in the archived thread. It’s a bit long.
Why would Laura need a memo, Jess? Laura is the one who first made the claim that she was kicked by a horse.
Posted by: Bethany at February 6, 2008 7:51 AM
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Olive never kicked me.
She spooked and we fell into a rack of concrete pipes. She was injured as well.
The “kicked” story was made up by the same chick who believes that attending a wedding is the same thing as “going on a bender,” and that I suffered from the “DDTs.”
…I thought you guys would be dancin’ over the fact that Huckabee won several states, and as the only pro-lifer left in the race, was now in a leveraging position for the VP spot.
FF,
It’s interesting that here Obama won by 1% (but still has to split the delegates with Hillary, but nontheless) while McCain won here by practically that same margin (though he gets to keep the delegates). Both the these elections were pulled by the cities. Elections are so much more exciting here than Oklahoma lol.
Hehe, Carla…I just LOVE the temper tantrums..especially when we’re getting dressed and she’s trapped in her shirt she just HAS to put on by herself and then I try to help her. Cue tantrum. The flailing about is somewhat minimized since her arms are caught though. It’s kind of funny.
My 2 year old flips over backward when I carry him and he doesn’t want me to.Oh, and gotta love the back arch getting that one in his car seat!! :)
“Oh, and gotta love the back arch getting that one in his car seat!! :)”
LOL!!! tickling them helps!
Sally,
Abstaining from sex to avoid an unwanted pregnancy is very empowering.
Posted by: Sandy at February 5, 2008 9:02 PM
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Is it? Do tell. How does that empower you?
Did you know that if you never eat, you will never die from the sins of eating? One never knows when one has progressed to the sin of gluttony.
kicked by a horse
Tell you what, that packs a wallop. We had horses – my dad still has three to this day, and you feel that. Cows too.
We had a billy goat with the highly imaginative name of “Bill.” Probably went 140 or 150 lbs., and you had to watch him – he’d charge and butt you, often right on the side of the hip, and that’s a major “ouch.”
The best was Napoleon, a ram, our male sheep. No horns, just a nice wooly padded head, and he’d charge and you could just jump over him. Still not one for little kids to mess around with, though.
My sister and her friend, the neighbor girl, were in the corral one time, and Nappy came in from the pasture, charged, and knocked the girl down. Her dad saw it happen, ran over, and in a fit of rage picked Nappy up and threw him. Nappy got up, charged, and knocked him down. My brothers and I saw the whole thing, and we were hysterical with laughter.
Doug, 7:03,
Funny story. Aren’t childhood memories the best?