Candy Darling
Yesterday AOL posted “Women behind the songs,” and pop culture sucker that I am, I clicked through photos and tags.
I stopped on Candy Darling, for whom Lou Reed wrote and Velvet Underground sang, Candy Says, (also covered by Blind Melon), and to whom Reed was referring in Walk on the Wild Side (“Candy came from out on the Island, In the backroom she was everybody’s darlin’….”). The AOL tag stated:
Lou Reed wrote this as an homage to Warhol “superstar” Candy Darling, who came to New York a shy young man and emerged as a glamorous blond woman. Reed channeled both Candy’s delicacy and steeliness in lines like “I’ve come to hate my body/And all that it requires in this world” – a reference to the female hormones that enabled her gender change but ultimately took her life.
We hear a lot about men dying from overuse of male hormones (i.e., steroids) but not about anyone dying from overuse of female hormones (i.e., steroids)….
Several sources including Wikipedia confirmed this as Candy’s cause of death, but I couldn’t find what exactly she took and how much. According to seaddavidtg:
Candy Darling’s desire to be a woman ultimately led to her death, as a result of the hormones she was taking in order to further her physical sex-transformation process. The hormone pills in question were a Swedish product, and were later removed from the market. They caused leukemia, and that cancer of the white bloodcells killed Candy in 1974, at the age of 30.
Another source described the hormones as “carcinogenic,” which estrogen is.
Here’s the the best version of the bittersweet Candy Says I could find on YouTube, by Antony & The Johnsons:
No point to this post other than to draw attention to the fact that overconsumption of female steroids as well as male steroids can kill.
The difference is men are never encouraged to consume just a little bit every day for decades but everything will be just fine.
And they’ don’t call them steroids either.
Jill Stanek is a nurse turned speaker, columnist and blogger, a national figure in the effort to protect both preborn and postborn innocent human life.
The difference is men are never encouraged to consume just a little bit every day for decades, but reassured everything will be fine.
I wish I were only “encouraged” to take them. I’ve been scolded, berated, condascended, and humiliated by my refusal to take them. One nurse even said that they come in pretty little compacts now, like face powder, so “no one would know.” Oh, and by the way, if you tell them that you are sexually abstinent to avoid the pressure, you lying or in denial. All the more reason to coerce you into taking them “for your own good.” and be assured that you will be patronized like a repressed little flower completely ignorant of your own body and biological functions, which I found grossly offensive.
Luckily, I found a Catholic NFP only OBGYN with an endometriosis specialty and never had to return to such people looking for answers. I am now disease-free and don’t have a daily chemical dependency on the pill for relief as well as the virtual assurance of being on the pill and being ill for the rest of my child-bearing years.
Just a little more background on my intense loathing of hormonal contraception. :)
Yeah, birth control pills supply you with enough progesterone to mimic pregnancy. If that’s dangerous, outlaw pregnancy as well.
Birth control pills provide a whole menu of health benefits.
Yeah, birth control pills supply you with enough progesterone to mimic pregnancy. If that’s dangerous, outlaw pregnancy as well. Pregnancy is a naturally-confined period of time from conception/implantation to either live birth or miscarriage. It includes a series of hormones to accommodate the different stages, not a steady influx of one. Bodies aren’t intended to be pregnant for years on end and tricking the body with hormones can cause irreparable damage.
Birth control pills provide a whole menu of health benefits.
Hmm…then why don’t you take them every morning with your Flintstone’s vitamin? I’ve pointed out before, one by one, that NO, THEY DON’T.
Laura,
I’ve corrected you on this on other posts and I refuse to repeat myself. You apparently know nothing about birth control pills, normal female reprodutive processes or Texas Advance Directive policy. Why you continue to embarass yourself by giving me opportunities to point out your ignorance is beyond me.
Why you continue to embarass yourself by giving me opportunities to point out your ignorance is beyond me.
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Oh, because you’re a liar.
No one has EVER “scolded and berated” you for not taking birth control pills. No medical professional cares that much WHATEVER you decide to do.
I’ve known dozens of women who have used the birth control pill for dozens of different reasons, and are thrilled with the results. I’ve taken a low-dose pill for decades to avoid endometriosis. mood swings, and inconvenient periods. Works like a charm.
Laura,
Well all except for the mood swings:)
MK, rofl…. !
Sometimes they just make it sooo easy!
Hi, never posted on here before, but was browsing and thought I’d leave a comment; Jacqueline-I understand your choice not to use birth control, and completely support that, but please don’t imply that it doesn’t provide any health benefits. Ovarian cancer runs in my family; it killed my mom a few years ago. Because of this, and the incredibly high likelihood I have of developing it when I’m older, every single one of my doctors (several cancer specialists, 2 genetic counselors, my family practicioner, and my gynecologist) have advised that I take birth control for a minimum of 5 consecutive years. Other than removing my ovaries when I’m done having kids or have decided I don’t want them, which I also plan on doing, birth control is the best preventitive method for ovarian cancer.
And on being scolded for not taking bc pills…I don’t know what kind of “doctor” would do that; unless you’re in a situation like mine, I would definitely advise you find someone else, as that is an extremely unethical thing to do. Many of my friends who are sexually active have talked to their doctors about it, and have never been coerced to take it, just given the information along with other methods of birth control.
And, um, I actually do take it every morning, usually with a Flintstone vitamin…not to be an ass, just found that funny :)
I’ve taken a low-dose pill for decades to avoid endometriosis. mood swings, and inconvenient periods. Works like a charm.
Apparently not, because you still have endometriosis. And you’re a slave to the pill for some relief. I’d say you’re worse off. Before you had endometriosis, now have endometriosis and a chemical dependency.
Oh, because you’re a liar.
So you make an idiot of yourself because you think I’m a liar? Good plan!
No one has EVER “scolded and berated” you for not taking birth control pills.
Probably not you, because apparently you do what they want. And apparently you do lots of indiscrimate romping, which supports their belief that we’re animals that don’t have control of our libidos. I was an assault to that being abstinent and a pain because I suggested finding another therapy that dealt with the actual ailment. When I explained that I didn’t want to break what was already working, like how the pill stops ovulation, I said, “There’s nothing wrong with my ovulation. I ovulate great. That is healthy and working just fine! Why stop it because a side effect thins the endometrium? Isn’t there just a drug to just thin the endometrium so I don’t fix what ain’t broke and have the side effects from it?” Basically she said I should be happy with the second-hand, tertiary fluke that we have and not expect something that actually treats the condition. I disagreed- and I’m glad I found an alternative.
Jac the Drama Queen: Apparently not, because you still have endometriosis. And you’re a slave to the pill for some relief.
Laura: I don’t have endometriosis. That’s because I take the low-dose birth control pill. Maybe you should have done the same.
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Jac the Drama Queen: So you make an idiot of yourself because you think I’m a liar? Good plan!
Laura: Are you shrieking again? Will you just have the back of your hand sutured to your forehead and be done with it. Then you can look like a wailing victim EVEN IN YOUR SLEEP!
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Laura: No one has EVER “scolded and berated” you for not taking birth control pills.
Jac the Drama Queen: Probably not you, because apparently you do what they want. And apparently you do lots of indiscrimate romping, which supports their belief that we’re animals that don’t have control of our libidos.
Laura: Gee, I’ve been with the same guy for about a bazillion years. Can you get ANYTHING right? (Remember; “Moral indignation is envy with a halo.” -HG Wells.)
Laura, I wouldn’t use H.G. Wells in reference to anything having to do with morality, since he married his cousin, left her for one of his students whom he also married, and during that time proceeded to have affairs with other women, including Margaret Sanger, the great lover of birth control and abortion. Wells was also a racist and proponent of eugenics.
All in all, not the best person to quote if you are trying to prove you have a strong moral foundation.
Loveeee Transformer.
All in all, not the best person to quote if you are trying to prove you have a strong moral foundation.
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…Or a giant stick up your butt.
Laura, I want to ask you a question. You told us the other day that you had a tubal ligation @ the age of 23. So, why do you care to battle abortion? Go to a tubal ligation board. You made your CHOICE. You don’t want kids, so you won’t have them. It’s a done deal. What’s the problem? Why advocate abortion?
Laura, why are you so angry? You didn’t want kids, but a lot of people do. So let them make their choice. A few of my girlfriends have had tubals too. They aren’t angry about them.
Laura,
All in all, not the best person to quote if you are trying to prove you have a strong moral foundation.
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…Or a giant stick up your butt.
Yes, it would prove you have one of those also…I know a doctor that can help…just sayin’.
MK, LOL!
MK, Heather, maybe that is why she is so angry . . . .
Jacqueline, I also used to suffer from endometriosis, but was able to completely rid myself of it, by natural means, without the pill. You are so right about the pill just adding another problem to the equation.
If Laura stopped taking her birth control pills, would her endometriosis come back? It sounds like it. But I don’t even have to take a pill for mine to have left. I remember the severe pain before…it was terrible. I don’t have it anymore, and it isn’t something I have to remember to take a pill every day to make sure it stays that way. Plus, I don’t have to worry about blood clots and other such side effects to my body in the long run. :)
If Laura stopped taking her birth control pills, would her endometriosis come back?
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I don’t have endometriosis. I’ve never had it.
It runs in my family HARD – especially among the childless women. I’ve seen what it does to them. Agony is putting it mildly. A doctor told me to take a low-dose pill starting in my early 20’s to avoid the ravages, and it’s worked like a charm – no symptoms whatsoever and I’m 44.
My current gyno tells women with a family history of endomentriosis to take a low-dose pill if they want to delay childbearing and retain their fertility. (I also just like having pretty skin and big, fat hair…)
Laura, you were so nice in that post, thank you so much. I mistakenly thought you had endemetriosis…sorry about that.
It runs in my family HARD – especially among the childless women.
You know what is really interesting about that? I had it extremely bad until I started having children too…and now that you say that it is more prevalent among childless women, it makes more sense. I also started eating better..my nutrition was terrible before my first pregnancy. With each child i had, the pain from menstrual cycles lessened and lessened, and now after having had three pregnancies to term, I have absolutely NO pain during my monthly. Not any at all. It is quite amazing, the change. I am absolutely sure that having children had something to do with my pain going away, although nutrition has another something to do with it as well. Just one more benefit to having children, besides the obvious (they’re just so sweet!).
Bethany: You know what is really interesting about that? I had it extremely bad until I started having children too…and now that you say that it is more prevalent among childless women, it makes more sense.
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That’s true. It’s one of those things pregnancy will fix. (Someone told me that I could avoid endometriosis my getting pregnant and having a D&C abortion. As militant as I am, I thought that was pretty warped…)
Anyway, my previous boss had crippling fibroid tumors. She and her husband suspended their “10-year – $10 million dollar” plan and cranked out a child. Not only are the fibroid tumors gone, but they’ve cranked out three more babies in four years. (She used to me the most pretentious person I ever met. She now has a minivan, a lot of sweatclothes and a bunch of Fischer-Price plastic in her living room. Who knew?)
(Someone told me that I could avoid endometriosis my getting pregnant and having a D&C abortion. As militant as I am, I thought that was pretty warped…)
Laura, I know you probably think I’m crazy, but I really appreciate you saying that…I mean, I just want to hug you. Really, I do. At the same time, I am so sad that someone would even suggest something like that….birth control pills don’t sound so bad when compared to that type of treatment, I must admit!
Anyway, my previous boss had crippling fibroid tumors. She and her husband suspended their “10-year – $10 million dollar” plan and cranked out a child. Not only are the fibroid tumors gone, but they’ve cranked out three more babies in four years. (She used to me the most pretentious person I ever met. She now has a minivan, a lot of sweatclothes and a bunch of Fischer-Price plastic in her living room. Who knew?)
That is really interesting!
By the way, Laura, I heard (can’t remember what topic it was in) that you have two nephews. How old are they? I am sure they love visiting you.
Laura,
Who are you and what have you done with that “angry woman” that was here earlier?
I know we got off on the wrong foot before, but I hope you will accept my apologies for being such a twit. I think we were all a little overwhelmed.
Anyway, welcome to the family! I know you won’t be asking me to stand up in your wedding, but I hope we can at least be “friends”…I think I’ll actually like you. Anyone that wield sarcasm the way you do must have a wicked sense of humor.
Forgive me?
And while I’ve got you here…aren’t you the one that said you were a vet? Cuz, boy, do I have a few (hundred) questions for you…two words…border collie?!?!?!?
“Well, C, women “who know better” often go ahead and continue pregnancies, to their later sorrow, too. Ain’t no guarantees…. still no reason to take away people’s freedom.”
Jacqueline: First of all- freedom has limits when it infringes of the freedom of others. I don’t have the freedom to dismember you with forceps, Doug, and rightly so. I shouldn’t have the freedom to dismember my child either.
Jacqueline, I brought this one forward – I missed it days ago and anyway….
The unborn in this argument are not “others” as far as having rights attributed, nor as far as being sensate, etc. As long as I stay on the right side of the law, society is pretty clear on born people, as in your example.
……..
And I still don’t see why the preference is a dead child vs. a live one. If a woman regrets choosing to parent she can choose to relinquish- the only difference is that in that case, the child is still living and still has his or her body parts attached.
Well, once there is a born baby, it can be relinquished. Yet most times, when a pregnancy is unwanted, to end it means the death of the unborn, pretty much no matter what.
Doug
Bethany,
one of the benefits of being pregnant is the health boost that comes from the fetus sending stem cells into mother to repair whatever is wrong in her … an example is a woman with hep-C had male cells as part of her liver. The cells came from her son, while she was pregnant with him.
http://www.tufts.edu/home/feature/?p=bianchi
Laura, sorry for all the rotten things I’ve said to you. Let’s start over! I’d like to get to know the person underneath all of that tough exterior. You can be very intimidating! We don’t bite!
John, thanks for making that great point. Human embryonic stem cells used correctly. There is a moral way. Nature.
Amen, John!
Well, once there is a born baby, it can be relinquished. Yet most times, when a pregnancy is unwanted, to end it means the death of the unborn, pretty much no matter what.
Doug, I think you missed my point. You said women continue pregnancies to their sorrow (implying that the sorrow is in parenting). I suggested that relinquishment is an option and an option that doesn’t include death and dismemberment. And then I asked why death and dismemberment is preferable to life and relinquishment. I know that many, many unplanned babies end up in the garbage disposal, but what I was asking is why they can’t end up in the arms of an adoptive parent instead. Why is a dead baby a better choice that a living one?
“Well, once there is a born baby, it can be relinquished. Yet most times, when a pregnancy is unwanted, to end it means the death of the unborn, pretty much no matter what.”
Jacqueline: Doug, I think you missed my point. You said women continue pregnancies to their sorrow (implying that the sorrow is in parenting). I suggested that relinquishment is an option and an option that doesn’t include death and dismemberment. And then I asked why death and dismemberment is preferable to life and relinquishment. I know that many, many unplanned babies end up in the garbage disposal, but what I was asking is why they can’t end up in the arms of an adoptive parent instead. Why is a dead baby a better choice that a living one?
Yes – some women do regret continuing pregnancies, whether they give up the babies or not.. Some parents feel sorrow and some – most, IMO – do not, on balance. Relinquishment is not an option before the unborn can survive outside the womb. So we are talking about different time frames.
In no way do I want unplanned babies ending up in the garbage disposal. IMO – better a thousand abortions than a born baby being killed. Heck, better a hundred thousand. If a given woman really, suddenly, wants to end a pregnancy, that late in gestation when the baby could survive outside the womb, just because she does not wish to be pregnancy any longer, then delivery can be induced, and I don’t have a problem with that at all.
Doug