by Hans Johnson
Friday is World Down Syndrome Day. This video, “Dear Future Mom”, is a message from the experts to the mothers who are expecting children with the condition.
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ju-q4OnBtNU[/youtube]
Email dailyvid@jillstanek.com with your video suggestions.
[HT: The Blaze“]
Violations will be deleted and you may be banned.
Threats will be immediately reported to authorities.
Following these rules will make everyone's experience visiting JillStanek.com better.
Our volunteer moderators make prudent judgment calls to provide an open forum to discuss these issues. They reserve the right to remove any comment for any reason. Jill's decisions on such moderations are final.
Go to gravatar.com to create your avatar.
Jill Stanek is a nurse turned speaker, columnist and blogger, a national figure in the effort to protect both preborn and postborn innocent human life.
If you’re already EXPECTING a baby, you’re not a “future” mom- you’re a mom…period. “Future” mom is when you’re thinking about/planning to get pregnant, not when you already ARE.
I completely agree, Pamela. An “expectant mom” is really expecting the birth of her child, not expecting to be a mother. She already is one.
It’s the one flaw in this p.s.a. / video prompting the children. It’s another example where we unwittingly concede a point of the other side.
But you can’t argue with the gist of the message.
Most women I know didn’t consider themselves to be mothers until they had given birth to a child. Until then it was “I’m going to be a mom.” or “I’m expecting a baby.” When women are pregnant I usually hear the man concerned being told “You’ll be a father soon.” It’s all subjective.
No, it’s objectively wrong, no matter what someone may think (or not be tbinking), unless they are awaiting a finalization in an adoption.
What part of “eating for two now” don’t you get?
So you would tell a woman who has suffered three miscarriages that she is “a mom of three” would you? Charming.
What’s your position on people who refer to themselves as ‘mom’ or ‘dad’ when they are speaking to their pets?
Heard a silly comment from a co-worker at work this week talking about her migraine medication, “When I was pregnant, my doctor assured me it (the medicine) was safe for fetal tissue.”
You can’t make this stuff up!
That adult tissue almost had me spraying my mouthful of soda all over the lunch table.
Are you saying that no such thing as fetal tissue exists?
Why does the word fetus exist?
Reality,
The problem with the pro-choice is that they not only can’t see the forest for the trees, they don’t even acknowledge the trees.
“So you would tell a woman who has suffered three miscarriages that she is a “mom of three” would you? Charming.”
Reality, a woman who has suffered three miscarriages IS a mother of three, regardless of what we say to her. Whist I can see that is important to take care when speaking to a woman who has suffered miscarriage and be prudent with the words we use, the fact remains that those miscarriages resulted in the deaths of her children, regardless of whether or not she recognises this.
I myself have two siblings who died before birth. Whether or not I choose to recognise their existence does not change the reality that they DID exist. Whether my own parents choose to refer to themselves as “parents of one” or “parents of three” does not change the objective reality that my siblings were their children too, just as I am. Heck, even if my parents disowned me and told everyone, “We have no children”, that doesn’t make that true!
Reality is not determined by how we feel, or by the words and phrases we choose to use. Reality is determined by objective facts and evidence. Again, whilst it may be painful for a woman to be referred to as a “mother of three” and therefore we may avoid using such language when talking with her, that does not have any baring on the reality of her situation.
Reality,
THAT is best left up to the mothers who have lost children.
I have three in heaven. They have names. They are my children and I am their mom.
Other moms choose not to acknowledge or grieve children lost to miscarriage.
That does not mean they never existed.
Again it is not up to you. But to deny women their grief over their babies lost to abortion, miscarriage or still birth? The babies they love? It is CRUEL of you.
Cute kids.
Is that supposed to mean anything Hans? It is the anti-choicer who has a narrow vision.
ersatz, the objective facts and evidence you speak of indicate that she is not a mom of three. Subjectively she may consider herself as such, or she may not. That is her choice.
As you say Whether my own parents choose to refer to themselves as “parents of one” or “parents of three”
A woman who has no children is not a mother.
THAT is best left up to the mothers who have lost children. – indeed.
Again it is not up to you. – nor you.
But to deny women their grief over their babies lost to abortion, miscarriage or still birth? The babies they love? It is CRUEL of you. – I am doing no such thing. The CRUELTY is insisting on declaring a woman to be a mother when she decides that since she has no children she is not a mother.
I am divorced but apparently might some still consider me married?
No, you were married. A woman was a mother at the time her child was conceived. I will agree with you that once the child is deceased, she is no longer (sadly) currently mother to that child.
But that there was a mother-child relationship is as subjectively true as if it were written in stone.
Actually, it was. “You shall honor your mother and father.” It’s a relationship we all have in common.
Reality,
Please cut and paste my own words where I stated that
It is up to ME(Carla)to decide whether a woman chooses to acknowledge her children that have died in her miscarriages.
When I state IT IS NOT UP TO YOU(Reality)and you respond NOR YOU……….where do I EVER say that it is up to me?
Good grief man.
I love, love, love this video!
I was simply agreeing with you because you had agreed with me.
Good grief person :-)
You have made NOR YOU your argument.
Which it isn’t. You’ve got nothing.
I don’t know that you even believe half the crap you write here.
“THAT is best left up to the mothers who have lost children. – indeed.” – see, I agreed.
I believe everything I write here. I am honest in my comments and my responses. You don’t agree with them or like them. That is perfectly fine. I certainly find I can’t believe half of what I read here.
YES, Reality and Hans. I have lost EIGHT children. They did not cease to be my children just because they died. I am the mother of NINE CHILDREN. One living, eight in Heaven.
Please don’t think I was agreeing with Reality. Once a mother, always a mother. But sadly a long-distance one for those who are lost.
A woman was a mother at the time her child was conceived. I will agree with you that once the child is deceased, she is no longer (sadly) currently mother to that child. – Once a mother, always a mother. But sadly a long-distance one for those who are lost. – which one is it Hans?
I’d love to be able to view how you’d deal with the response you would get if you tried to tell my ex-wife she is a mother of two.
I wouldn’t get into such a personal discussion, Reality. But my (quietly held) belief is that she mothered two children, as you fathered them.
There is only one verse in the Bible that comments directly on our relationships in the next life. And that would indicate they we will all be brothers and sisters to one another, and no longer our current parent-child dynamic.
But I’m only seeing through a glass darkly here. And I find sweeping the memory of lost children under the rug almost as disturbing as being pro-choice.
Most women I have met who have announced a pregnancy say “I’m going to be a mom.”
The couple of times I’ve heard people say “You’re a mom!” the response has been “Well not yet.”
And as I said earlier, when women are pregnant I usually hear the man concerned being told “You’ll be a father soon.”
I have met women who are childless after one or more miscarriages. None of them would ever refer to themselves as being, or having ever been, mothers.
“I find sweeping the memory of lost children under the rug” – what ‘memory’ is there of a six week miscarriage?
You are welcome to your (quietly held?) belief. Don’t expect others to agree or adhere to your subjective language.