Pro-life video of the day: Two dads, two choices
by Hans Johnson
Just before noon on Sunday, quarterback Joe Flacco was with his Baltimore Ravens teammates preparing for the game with the Cleveland Browns when he got a phone call. It was his wife, Dana, calling from a hospital in New Jersey to say she had just given birth to Daniel, their second son.
Flacco was thinking about joking to his coach John Harbaugh that morning that he was going to rush to his wife’s side, though he never intended to do so.
Ironically the day before pro-golfer Hunter Mahan made a hole-in-one, winning himself a new BMW. I say ironically because earlier this summer Mahan withdrew from the Canadian Open and it’s potential million-dollar purse while he was leading – to be with his wife Kandi when she gave birth to their daughter Zoe Olivia.
So would you give Flacco a pass because he is part of a team sport, where others depend on him, or should his family come first? Here are the Mahans being interviewed for ABC’S Good Morning America:
[youtube]http://youtu.be/U_LRJRb22Zo[/youtube]
Email dailyvid@jillstanek.com with your video suggestions.
Jill Stanek is a nurse turned speaker, columnist and blogger, a national figure in the effort to protect both preborn and postborn innocent human life.
I think whether this was a serious jerk move or a perfectly fine move is purely between he and his wife. While my husband has been there for all 3 births (so far) and we’d be very disapointed and distressed if he missed a birth, the notion of a father being physically there at the birth of his child is actually a very new and relatively rare concept. What’s important is mom having the support she needs, be that her mother, husband, sister, cousin, friend, or hired doula, and that dad is emotionally comfortable with his role. If mom wants dad there, then dad choosing his job first is abysmally bad. But if mom was comfortable with whomever she chose as her birthing partner while her husband was fulfilling his contractual job obligations, and he’s emotionally comfortable not being there, then it wouldn’t be very appropriate for him to be there just so it looked good to outsiders.
This speaks to priorities and personal choices. I would rather have heard that John Harbaugh dropped everything, paid a penalty for missing this game, and sat next to his wife at the hospital. Money drives people nuts…
John Harbaugh silly me! I meant Joe Flacco. This is what happends when you don’t watch football, haha. Soccer anyone?
Depends on what the couple was okay with, I guess. hope his wife genuinely agreed and had the support she needed, rather than feel obligated to agree.
I wouldn’t have missed my kid’s births for anything though.
I can’t imagine not having my husband there unless it was a dire emergency. But, I guess it is between the couple who are having the baby. (My respect goes to the man who DID sacrifice to be there though…)
Hi MaryRose,
I think both you and Prax are absolutely wonderful sisters. { and I do mean kin in a very good way}. Since we are Jesus’ family in a real sense, we are called to love each other under some very trying circumstances at time – (His crucifixion guarantees this). It can be very hard for anyone from outside to know just when/where/or-if to stick their-finger-in-the-door. It is even more frustrating when a believer says their practice IS THE FAITH. The Catholic faith is being a Jesus-follower – the person of God. This may seem strange, but doing everything right got Jesus tortured and killed by those who knew and followed the very same set of rules. So following a person rather than a set of great principles is more true and more uncertain at the same time. Like the apostles we are invited to live in Jesus. The ten commandments can leave us (through minimalism) to remain outside His will … read the parable of the Good Samaritan, to get a deeper appreciation. [The priest (walking on the other side of the road) did EXACTLY what the Law required of him (and should be commended for it)!]
sure hopes this helps.
“Hi MaryRose”
Who has yet to comment on this thread.
This is actually relevant to this website?
“Live babies ‘r’ us.”
Family dynamics affect their well-being, so we discuss a whole lot more than that they deserve to live.
hi JDC and Merit,
gosh it’s hard to find a nice way to say ‘Up yours!’; so won’t even try!
“merit” had a Eureka moment!!! I recorded this on the Yahoo Calendar for all eternity.
You do realize what “up yours” truly means John? So what is it that you are trying to tell us?
Whoa, John! That was a little harsh, wasn’t it? I was merely pointing out that you were addressing someone who has not chimed in on this thread.
Lol oh jeez
I’ve heard more than one story of a father passing out cold during the birth, so y’know, it’s not for every dad to be there.
JDC no worries, John is just a little “uptight” shall I say. He needs a little of this and a little of that…
He should have been there. His coach and teammates should have encouraged him to do so. It’s only a ball game.
Maybe John’s felling a little ‘tired and emotional’?
John McDowell, how is it relevant?
Hi peoples,
MaryRose got confused by my words on a previous thread and had asked me to clarify … sure hope I did.
I was talking about something familiar – maybe in-your-face, but my awkward phrasing (metaphysical delusion) meant only turn-off time for most folks. So I’ll take another (hopefully more successful) stab at it, now.
I initiated this idea with Jack (who wondered what I was talking about), when we talked about Obama being deluded. Since Jill had in mind a sense of delusion that is throughout scripture and has effects quite different than psychological-delusion (often substance addiction). What I called metaphysical delusion is a manifestation of sin. Therefore, the two main delusions are a non-existent God; and that sin does not exist. There are a whole slew of these beliefs … from evil too does not exist!
It is difficult to talk of direct ramifications, but from my experience it dulls the sense of awe. Jack (like X and most parents) learn to be in awe naturally at the astounding beauty of their babies. {X and Jack ‘waste’ time in the little-one’s presence and experience a monumental sense of being priveleged.]
Two areas often display this awe and delight. The first is sight/vision … images from the Hubble telesclpe AND the seven natural wonders of the world (Niagara Falls; the Grand Canyon; etc)..And then there was my friend sitting in his 2nd-year engineering class, transfixed by the beauty of a single Easter Lily growing on the window sill. Gio quit engineering and entered the seminary, the next term. There is also outstanding beauty in many churches. The bible itself is a library filled with unparalleled word-beauty.
The second is sound … from The Big Bang; Mozart; Bach; Pacabel and others … music fills the mind with a numbing awe.
There is a side note to this: one of the titles of Mary (Jesus’ mom) is Immaculate Conception meaning born-without-sin. It means by default she was not blunted/dulled by the pains of Jesus’ agony.
I’m sorry John I still don’t understand what you’re talking about. I feel like I’m being insulted though lol.
Therefore, the two main delusions are a non-existent God – well that’s amusing.
and that sin does not exist – depends on how you classify ‘sin’
from evil too does not exist! – which it doesn’t, not in the biblical sense anyway.
{X and Jack ‘waste’ time in the little-one’s presence and experience a monumental sense of being priveleged.] – ‘waste’ time?
I agree with Reality that he should have been there. (The sky is falling!!) I don’t think he’s a jerk or something for fulfilling his commitment to the team, but I think he may regret it on some level. It was a dare-to-be-great opportunity. Also makes me wonder how teams would view family life and baby news if they thought their teammates would miss a game or two because of them.
“He should have been there. His coach and teammates should have encouraged him to do so. It’s only a ball game. ”
Just FYI “reality” – that first “like” is from me. Don’t make me regret it…
hey Reality,
the word ‘waste’ is carefully chosen. One human chooses to spend his/her precious time with another and ‘the two become one’. [If it is a ‘wasting’-parent, the bond formed will pay-off bigtime as the years go by … birthdays, anniversaries… and deaths.]
This time spent ‘bonding’ does not always take place at birth; nor is it necessarily a one-shot-deal. But ‘bonding’ does seem essential to human (and other species) development/growth.
That kid will bond over several hundred dollars in his trust fund John. Ching ching!!!
The choice is entirely yours Thomas R.
So John, are you saying that a ‘wasting’ parent is a good or successful parent? That’s what it sounds like. How does ‘wasting’ fit into that? Or is ‘wasting’ a reference to them wasting away from disease or wasting as in prodigal?
Two humans cannot become one.
Hi again Reality,
man, are you ever hung-up on ‘wasting’ time? a very good friend, now 92 gave me a gift. She said ‘wasting-time’ is a superior idea When first dating Marcel (her future hubby). we just liked to hang-out together. often doing meaningless things.’
After six kids, a husband died and two in-law kids died too, do you think she would like to know that humans cannot bond (become one)! No thank you. You can go to your ‘cold’ bed, now. [Is time spent with you a waste?]
silly me … because you can’t smell, nor taste nor see, bonds – nor love, nor courage, nor fidelity, nor hope, nor peace, etc… they DO NOT EXIST (right)?
I would not call what you describe ‘wasting’ time John.
Time spent doing anything, or nothing at all, with someone or those who have meaning to us is never a waste of time.
We all know there is too much speed and greed. That is the real waste.
People can bond to a greater or lesser extent but they cannot become one. If they are one then one has been subsumed. And that’s not healthy.
I don’t need you offering advice or assumptions John.
silly me … because you can’t smell, nor taste nor see, bonds – nor love, nor courage, nor fidelity, nor hope, nor peace, etc… they DO NOT EXIST (right)? – yes, silly you, they are observable.
Sure makes Flacco look like a Jackass for not going to be with his wife for the birth of their child.
I think he should be ashamed.
“So would you give Flacco a pass…..?”
Well, Flacco is the Quarterback, so he’s generally the one that is giving the passes. : P
Good point, Jespren – it’s between Flacco and his wife.
John McD – good to see you’re here, my old friend. : )
People, come on – John did not mean that was actually “wasting time” in the sense that it is time ill-spent.
Doug, you haven’t been here forever. How have you been?
Hey Jack. : )
Well, 54 years old, working like crazy – I guess the “feast” is better than the “famine,” there. Nothing much new to report; still, overall, the same philosophical approach to things, while still thinking that we live in what are somewhat momentous times, due to economic reality.
One little vignette – my wife teaches High School, in the Atlanta, Georgia area, and two of her present/past students are Veronica and Umberto. Veronica is African-American, and Umberto is Hispanic. Names changed to disguise actuality. They have been a couple for a long time, especially “long” when you are still a teenager. ; )
Veronica got pregnant early this year, and it was tough for the two of them – Veronica’s mother was not cool with Umberto living at their house, and both families are in relatively hard economic straits. As I’m not home very much, Veronica stayed with my wife much of the time, and Umberto was working. Veronica would ride to school with my wife.
Spring went to summer, then summer went to fall, and here we are. Veronica is soon to give birth – it will be a Caesarean delivery; not sure why, but the docs have thus decreed. I had to laugh last week – my wife was describing how much Umberto is “into” the whole thing of Veronica being pregnant, and how much he loves all aspects of it.
Umberto’s family is in the US illegally, and were he and Veronica to get married right now, it would put his family from Mexico in some increased jeopardy, apparently. Not sure how that will work out. But it was more than touching, hearing my wife’s description of how Umberto is with Veronica, and with everything surrounding – including the ultrasound of a baby with a big head of hair.