I said, ‘I’m not doing this again. I can’t.’ I was angry at life and at God….
Hopefully we can help people understand that there’s nothing to be ashamed of…. It’s such a taboo subject, but it’s a very common problem.
~Giuliana DePandi Rancic, co-star of the Style Network reality show Giuliana & Bill, remarking on her feelings following IVF and a miscarriage at 9 weeks, as quoted by People, September 30
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Jill Stanek is a nurse turned speaker, columnist and blogger, a national figure in the effort to protect both preborn and postborn innocent human life.
I agree in a sense that IVF and miscariage shouldn’t be a taboo subjects. A lot of people experience them and they have to be talked about. However, they are also a very private and personal matter for everyone, and it’s also to do with sexuality/procreation, which is an intimate thing in every family.
Personally, I’m against IVF, as in the process it destroys hundreds of lives at their very beginning. Call it “potential lives” if you wish, but that doesn’t deny the fact that those particular children with those particular qualities, faces, voices will not come to exist. They are absolutely unique and different from eachother. And it’s a real shame they are treated as mere disposables.
My second problem is with people playing God. He alone is Creator of life, and without His will, no life comes to be. You can try as you might to have a child and never succeed (even with IVF), if it’s not His will to happen. So, people go against God, get themselves into pickle and then… blame Him??!!! What kind of weird logic is that???? I think the reason why some couples are infertile is that God knows how many children don’t have a home and He wishes to place them into the families that would love and nurture them as their own.
During natural conception, the heartiest sperm get to compete for the egg. In IVF, like much of our culture during the last decade, mediocrity reigns supreme.
There’s nothing potential, lives have been lost. And I agree, as tragic as it is for the parents, don’t play at being a god, and then get angry at the real God.
The disconnect seems to be in this question. WHY would a woman grieve a miscarriage of 9 weeks?
The proaborts continually crow about a “bunch of cells” and long to see that be true. Science proves them wrong. We are all of bunch of cells. A 9 week old preborn has eyes, ears, fingers, toes, arms, legs and a face. You can try to dehumanize that which is human but a 4D ultrasound will prove you wrong too.
I thought my miscarriage was my punishment for the abortion. I was angry at God too and now know that holding my miscarried child in my hand was how He woke me up to the horror of abortion and drew me to Himself.
Those of us who have miscarried or aborted(or both!)know the truth. A child has died.
We grieve because we love.
Um, since when is IVF a “taboo” subject? Please… single women are flaunting their IVF these days, from celebrities on down. I don’t detect any shame or embarrassment associated with it. (I don’t agree with IVF — I believe it is wrong.) I am sorry she lost her child at 9 weeks. I lost my first child at 9 weeks as well. Grief is the only word for it.
I think the “taboo” subject she was referring to is her miscarriage.
It would have to be the miscarriage she’s referring to because IVF is so expensive, I don’t think it could be considered “a common problem.”
Exactly, Carla. I’ve been through that (miscarriage) FOUR times. It never gets easier (emotionally).
I’m so sorry for your losses, Pamela.
Thank You, Vannah. I appreciate that.