by Carder
I always thought I wouldn’t want to be pregnant at my wedding….
But I love it. It’s beautiful to know our baby was there with us. And I’ve never really been that traditional….
It was a real celebration of love.
~ Australian actress Teresa Palmer on getting married while pregnant to actor and director Mark Webber, in an interview with WHO Magazine, as quoted by People, January 9
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Jill Stanek is a nurse turned speaker, columnist and blogger, a national figure in the effort to protect both preborn and postborn innocent human life.
Preggy bellies in *white* dresses drive me crazy (her’s actually appears cream), but in today’s age what a beautiful sight! The ‘sin’ (from a Christian perspective) obviously happened several months ago, and now the couple is coming together as is proper to bind themselves in marriage and give the baby a proper home. What could possibly be a better outcome to a swollen belly without a ring? A pregnant belly in a wedding dress means that a couple got pregnant outside of marriage, yes, but the *pregnancy* isn’t the sin, it’s merely a consequence of that sin, and then instead of 1) killing the baby 2) raising the baby as a single parent or 3) cohabitating without marrying, both man and woman chose to act like proper adults and put their ‘wild oats’ days aside. Moreover the actual sin, sex outside of marriage, is being removed from their lives, hopefully not to return.
I’ve never heard of Teresa Palmer, but congratulations to her. Yes, her BABY was at the ceremony! If only all actors recognized the humanity of the unborn…
Congratulations to Teresa and Mark!
This is awesome, and a bigger deal than it looks. I had a major problem because of this issue… A friend had an abortion for a lot of reasons, but one was because she didn’t want to be pregnant in her wedding dress. It was a nightmare for everyone involved.
Agreed Jespren. And so well written. Thank you.
First comes love. Then comes marriage. Then comes baby in the baby carriage.
There was a REASON our great great grandparents were virgins when they married.
There was a REASON our great great grandparents were virgins when they married.
My daughter was present at my wedding, too. Not that I’m particularly proud of it, but it happens.
Said daughter AND her husband waited until their wedding night, and they are not weird, nuts, or religious fanatics. It IS possible!
This whole “oh, SHE’S wearing a WHITE dress!” said about non-virginial brides drives me crazy, and IMO is sexist, because no one seems to care what color the grooms tux is!
Another thing I just learned about Catholic weddings is that the bride actually is NOT “given away” by her father, even though he often escorts her to the altar. The phrase, “Who gives this woman to be married to this man?” is not said in that ceremony because the sacrament of marriage is considered the giving of the bride and groom to each other. Even the walking down the aisle has changed in many wedding ceremonies of various (or no) religions, one example, having both the bride and groom be escorted down the aisle by both their parents.
Your right about the bride not being “given away” at Catholic weddings, MemyselfandI. I was also corrected when I said to someone, “Father Peter married us.” They responded, “Father did not marry you. You and your husband married each other.”
Moreover the actual sin, sex outside of marriage, is being removed from their lives, hopefully not to return. – are you saying we can commit ‘sin’ as long as we do the ‘right thing’ eventually? All will be ok?
There was a REASON our great great grandparents were virgins when they married. – yes, fear. It wasn’t enough to stop all of them though.
The priest who performed the marriage ceremony for my former wife and I took off with a young lady shortly thereafter, leaving his wife and three children. And the church of course. Maybe performing non-religious marriage ceremonies put him on the wrong path?
“are you saying we can commit ‘sin’ as long as we do the ‘right thing’ eventually? All will be ok?”
Well the whole idea is that everyone is a sinner, no one is perfect, and that everyone can be forgiven and get “back on track” so to speak. I’m pretty sure that at least Catholics consider “the sin of presumption” when you sin figuring you’ll just be forgiven, that makes the sin graver than a sin of passion or whatever. I’m not to clear on it but your intent matters I believe. Everyone makes mistakes but deliberately committing sins because you can be forgiven is… a sin. Lol.
That makes sense Jack :-)
It’s worth mentioning that white wedding dresses became popular simply because Queen Victoria wore a white dress when she got married, not because of any idea that white dresses mean virginity. The idea that white dress means virgin bride is a modern one, actually.
I believe that it is important for all of us who are pro-life to show acceptance and love to women who are pregnant regardless of the circumstances.
Wow, Reality, reading comprehension is fun! Appreciating that someone choses to stop a habitual sin is somehow akin to saying habitual sin is okay?
“shall we abide in sin so that grace may abound? Certainly not!”
Everyone sins, everyone is going to sin. The point is to be forgiven, and forgiveness requires repentance. You can not possibly both repent from a sin and habitually practice it, since repent literally means ‘to turn away from’. So no sin is ‘all right’ it is never ‘all right’ to sin, that’s why we need forgiveness. But seeing someone turn from a sin is a wonderful thing, getting married means two people are no longer commuting fornication, that’s GREAT. To be sure other sins will follow, but having turned from fornication they now have at least the possibility of receiving grace through repentance and forgiveness for that sin.
The point is to be forgiven, and forgiveness requires repentance. – what if you just happen to stop committing the ‘sin’ but feel no repentance about it? These two have now gotten married but somehow I doubt they feel much guilt about what they did previously.
getting married means two people are no longer commuting fornication – I’ve never had sex on a bus or train (or even a plane) and certainly not whilst driving!
Reality,
I said they have the possibility now to be forgiven, whether they actually do repent isn’t something an outsider can really comment on, but at least now they have the *possibility* of repentance because they’ve turned from the sin.
I’m getting used to a new tablet pc, it’s autocorrect feature is a bit bizare at times. Commit apparently turned into commute.
Autocorrect can be infuriating, Jespren! Note to phone: I never, ever mean “ducking.” Stop it.
A few years ago, a friend of mine once texted her husband to ask (quite reasonably, I think), “Why is there bacon on the couch?” Her phone latched onto that for some reason and for, like, months afterwards, every time she typed “why” it would auto-fill “is there bacon on the couch?” Best part was it would do it in all caps, like screaming, since that’s how she’d initially typed it.
I’m getting used to a new tablet pc, it’s autocorrect feature is a bit bizare at times. Commit apparently turned into commute. – I figured it was something like that. It just created an amusing scenario :-)
Reality, my dad used to say ‘flying fornication of a perforated pastry’ as a ‘kid-friendly’ curse. so I got a giggle when you pointed it out too.
That’s the best “curse” ever Jespren, I literally laughed out loud at that one.
Oh, and memyselfandI, I forget to tell you. I totally agree about the “white dress” thing, it’s ridiculous. Publicly “branding” women who aren’t virgins when they marry by pressuring them to wear a different color dress is counterproductive and sexist. Scarlet letter indeed.
Maybe dudes should have to wear a dunce cap if they aren’t virgins when they marry.
Well we all know there are plenty of white dresses which always have been, and still are, worn ‘dishonestly’ ;-)
Is the fact that there is such a ‘rule’ for women but not men indicative of the whole ‘ownership’ thing?
I prefer Amanda Palmer to Teresa Palmer.
I don’t know if it’s “ownership” Reality. I think it’s more to do with paternity. Before the advent of paternity tests (and because we lived in a patriarchal culture where inheritance was stupidly passed through the male line), the only way men could be certain his children were really his children was by pretty tight control of female sexuality, including virginity at marriage. I’m not saying that’s right, at all, I’m just saying I think that’s where that stuff came from at least partially.
I don’t know why they didn’t make inheritance laws matriarchal, though. It would have made more sense. You can’t, as a man, always know for certain if a baby is yours, but a woman always knows if a kid is hers. If it is really that important to keep property in the family and pass on names, then matriarchal inheritance would have made oodles more sense. Some cultures passed things through the maternal line like that, but western culture ended up paternal instead.
The woman always knows if the kid is hers biologically of course, and also if it isn’t. (if she adopted an embryo or donor egg) These cases might still be relatively rare, but it doesn’t seem to have quite caught on with some in our society that a woman can bear a child who is not biologically related to her. For example. when a woman in her sixties has a baby some people are stunned because they assume she concieved naturally, when she actually was implanted with embryos containing the eggs of much younger women.
P.S. As for last names, apparently anyone can have any name they want legally by the time they turn eighteen or sooner, if both parents agree.