Jivin J’s Life Links 1-12-10
by JivinJ
When the institute handed out nearly $230 million in October to 14 research teams, including Aboody’s at City of Hope, it was its largest scientific investment by far. But it came with strings attached: In 4 years, recipients should have a clinical trial request ready to file with the FDA. Only 4 of the projects involve embryonic stem cells….
It is a significant change in direction for an effort originally designed to bolster research on human embryonic stem cells.
By the time I had my second child, I knew, without question, that every “fetus” is a nascent human being. I finally recognized on an emotional level that the zygote created on the first day is the same life as the baby you hold in your arms on the last. It is also the same as the toddler that lisps “I wuv you,” and the pre-teen who says “You’re the best mommy ever.” They all start there, right inside each mother…..
As for me, long time readers of this blog know that, even though intellectually and morally I’m no longer pro-choice, I’m still not entirely pro-life. I accept abortion to protect the mother’s life, and can agree to abortion in cases of rape or incest, even though that’s not fair to the innocent fetus. My problem is that, while I know that convenience abortions are morally wrong, I still get this emotional, lizard-brain feeling of a trapped rat in a cage when I imagine myself being a young woman who finds herself pregnant when she doesn’t want to be.
For me, although motherhood has had many rewards, it’s also entailed many sacrifices. When I think of those sacrifices, and then apply them to, say, a 22 year old version of me, or when I imagine my daughter grown, and in the same situation, I still want to cry out “But that’s not fair.” When that happens, though, I squish my lizard-brain, tell myself “Life isn’t fair,” and try to focus on the fetus and not my feelings. I only hope that, if my daughter, before she’s married, ever does come to tell me she’s pregnant, I remember that deeper morality, and give her the right advice.
If things had gone according to plan, my child would have been born around Christmastime. But obviously, things took a different turn. After a few weeks of getting used to the fact that I was going to be a Dad, I began thinking about names, getting excited for it, and picturing the future as a father. But that rug was ripped out from under me.
Now I am stuck with having periodical dreams of dead babies, random crying noises, future images of my child growing up – and worst of all, the one last night in which I was holding my baby before it melted into a pool of blood in my arms.
KS law defines voluntary manslaughter as the “unreasonable but honest belief that circumstances existed that justified deadly force” during an intentional killing.
Chief Deputy Dist. Atty. Kim Parker contended in her motion that case law indicated “the attacker must have an actual fear of an imminent attack, regardless of whether the belief is reasonable.”

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